Recollections of a chaperonSullivan, Arabella Jane
General
Recollections of a chaperon
Sullivan, Arabella Jane
English fiction -- 19th century
“But, Milly, he never pays me half as many compliments as other people
do; and he never said a word like being in love with me; and he never
spoke a word against Lord Montreville; and he never told me I was too
young or too pretty for him—he never said any of the things I have
been put on my guard against, as being the first advances of a man who
wishes to flirt with a married woman; for I have sometimes watched to
see whether he did, for fear he should be making love before I was
aware.”
“You know best, my lady; but I should think you would not have been on
the look-out for it, if he had no such thing in his head.”
“Why, Milly, you are as bad as all the rest of the world! But what
shall I do? My husband says I must not go on as I have done; and then
he has asked Mr. Delville to dinner to-morrow—and what can I do? What
can I say? How am I to behave to him?”
“Sure, my lady, just be civil and pleasant.”
“That is all I have ever been, Milly! O dear! O dear! If I had but
married some good young man who had loved me truly, and whom I could
have loved and respected, as I would fain love and respect my husband,
how easy it would have been to do my duty, if he had been ever so poor
and humble!”
“Now don’t you be fretting in this way, my lady. Some has one trial,
and some another; and people always think their own trial the hardest
to bear. I thought mine were very hard to bear; but in all my troubles
I had one comfort—my duty always lay straight before me—I always knew
what I ought to do, though ’twas a hard matter sometimes to do it
without murmuring.”
“I will not go to the ball to-night! Yet perhaps Mr. Delville may guess
why—I had better go. By the by, this is the Duchess of Altonworth’s
evening for being at home. I will go there. It will not seem so odd as
not going out at all, and Mr. Delville is very seldom at her parties.
Besides, I shall have an opportunity of asking the Duchess if she will
receive me early to-morrow. She is good, kind, and judicious, and she
knows the world well, too. I will tell her what an uncomfortable state
I am in, and she will advise me.”
Lord Montreville dined out at a political dinner, and they met no more
in the course of the evening.
To the Duchess of Altonworth’s Lucy went, filled with a desire to do
what was right, but at the same time with a strong conviction of her
own wrongs, and in consequence a feeling of martyrdom.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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