Lesbians -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Women teachers -- Fiction
Alwynne, quite unconscious of the trait, had at first done herself harm
by her unfeigned interest in Clare's circle. It took the elder woman
some suspicious weeks to realise that Alwynne lacked completely her own
_dompteuse_ instinct, her craving for power; that she was as innocent of
knowledge of her own charm as unwedded Eve; that her impulse to Clare
was an impulse of the freshest, sweetest hero-worship; but the
realisation came at last, and Clare opened her hungry heart to her, and,
warmed by Alwynne's affection, wondered that she had hesitated so long.
Alwynne never guessed that she had been doubted. Clare was proud of her
genuine skill as a character reader--had been a little pleased to give
Alwynne proof of her penetration when occasion arose; and Alwynne, less
trained, less critical, thought her omniscient, and never dreamed that
the motives of her obscurest actions, the sources of her most veiled
references were not plain to Clare. Secure of comprehension, she went
her way: any one in whom Clare was interested must needs attract her: so
she took pains to become intimate with Clare's adorers, from a very real
sympathy with their appreciation of Clare, whom she no more grudged to
them than a priestess would grudge the unveiling of her goddess to the
initiate. She received their confidences, learned their secrets, fanned
the flame of their enthusiasms. Too lately a schoolgirl herself, too
innocent and ignorant to dream of danger, she did her loyal utmost in
furtherance of the cult, measuring the artificial and unbalanced
emotions she encountered by the rule of her own saner affection, and, in
her desire to see her friend appreciated, in all good faith utilised her
degree of authority to encourage what an older woman would have
recognised and combated as incipient hysteria.
Gradually she became, through her frank sympathy, combined with her
slightly indeterminate official position, the intermediary, the
interpreter of Clare to the feverish school. Clare herself, her initial
distrust over, found this useful. She could afford to be moody, erratic,
whimsical; to be extravagant in her praises and reproofs; to
deteriorate, at times, into a caricature of her own bizarre personality,
with the comfortable assurance that there was ever a magician in her
wake to steady her tottering shrines, mix oil with her vitriol, and
prove her pinchbeck gold.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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