Roughing it De LuxeCobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
General
Roughing it De Luxe
Cobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
American wit and humor; California -- Description and travel; Grand Canyon (Ariz.) -- Description and travel
Speculation concerning the causes of these strange manifestations
ran--as the novelists say--rife. Some thought that, overcome with
disappointment by the discovery that we had changed at Williams in the
middle of the night, without his knowing anything about it, he was
having a fit all alone up there. Presently the excitement abated; and
then, after having first lowered his baggage, our friend descended to
the aisle and the mystery was explained. He had solved the question of
what to wear while gazing at the Grand Canon. He was dressed in a new
golf suit, complete--from the dinky cap to the Scotch plaid stockings.
If ever that man visits Niagara, I should dearly love to be on hand to
see him when he comes out to view the Falls, wearing his bathing suit.
Some of us aboard that train did not seem to care deeply for the desert;
the cactus possibly disappointed others; and the mesquit failed to give
general satisfaction, though at a conservative estimate we passed
through nine million miles of it. A few of the delegates from the
Eastern seaboard appeared to be irked by the tribal dancing of the Hopi
Indians, for there was not a turkey-trotter in the bunch, the Indian
settlements of Arizona being the only terpsichorean centers in this
country to which the Young Turk movement had not penetrated yet. Some
objected to the plains because they were so flat and plainlike, and some
to the mountains because of their exceedingly mountainous aspect; but on
one point we all agreed--on the uniform excellence of the dining-car
service.
It is a powerfully hard thing for a man to project his personality
across the grave. In making their wills and providing for the carrying
on of their pet enterprises a number of our richest men have endeavored
from time to time to disprove this; but, to date, the percentage of
successes has not been large. So far as most of us are concerned the
burden of proof shows that in this regard we are one with the famous
little dog whose name was Rover--when we die, we die all over. Every big
success represents the personality of a living man; rarely ever does it
represent the personality of a dead man.
The original Fred Harvey is dead--has been dead, in fact, for several
years; but his spirit goes marching on across the southwestern half of
this country. Two thousand miles from salt water, the oysters that are
served on his dining cars do not seem to be suffering from car-sickness.
And you can get a beefsteak measuring eighteen inches from tip to tip.
There are spring chickens with the most magnificent bust development I
ever saw outside of a burlesque show; and the eggs taste as though they
might have originated with a hen instead of a cold-storage vault. If
there was only a cabaret show going up and down the middle of the car
during meals, even the New York passengers would be satisfied with the
service, I think.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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