Humorous stories; Valets -- Fiction; Washington (State) -- Fiction
“I’ll give you one chance to get even. I’ll guess your fingers this
time.” Accordingly I put one hand behind me and firmly crossed the
fingers, fancying that he would guess them to be uncrossed. Instead of
which he called out “Crossed,” and I was obliged to show them in that
wise, though, as before pointed out, I could easily have defeated him
by uncrossing them before revealing my hand. I mean to say, it is not
on the face of it a game one would care to play with casual
acquaintances, and I questioned even then in my own mind its
prevalence in the States. (As a matter of fact, I may say that in my
later life in the States I could find no trace of it, and now believe
it to have been a pure invention on the part of the Tuttle person. I
mean to say, I later became convinced that it was, properly speaking,
not a game at all.)
Again they were hugely delighted at my loss and rapped smartly on the
table for more drink, and now to my embarrassment I discovered that I
lacked the money to pay for this “round” as they would call it.
“Beg pardon, sir,” said I discreetly to Cousin Egbert, “but if you
could let me have a bit of change, a half-crown or so----” To my
surprise he regarded me coldly and shook his head emphatically in the
negative.
“Not me,” he said; “I’ve been had too often. You’re a good smooth
talker and you may be all right, but I can’t take a chance at my time
of life.”
“What’s he want now?” asked the other.
“The old story,” said Cousin Egbert: “come off and left his purse on
the hatrack or out in the woodshed some place.” This was the height of
absurdity, for I had said nothing of the sort.
“I was looking for something like that,” said the other “I never make
a mistake in faces. You got a watch there haven’t you?”
“Yes, sir,” I said, and laid on the table my silver English
half-hunter with Albert. They both fell to examining this with
interest, and presently the Tuttle person spoke up excitedly:
“Well, darn my skin if he ain’t got a genuine double Gazottz. How did
you come by this, my man?” he demanded sharply.
“It came from my brother-in-law, sir,” I explained, “six years ago as
security for a trifling loan.”
“He sounds honest enough,” said the Tuttle person to Cousin Egbert.
“Yes, but maybe it ain’t a regular double Gazottz,” said the latter.
“The market is flooded with imitations.”
“No, sir, I can’t be fooled on them boys,” insisted the other.
“Blindfold me and I could pick a double Gazottz out every time. I’m
going to take a chance on it, anyway.” Whereupon the fellow pocketed
my watch and from his wallet passed me a note of the so-called French
money which I was astounded to observe was for the equivalent of four
pounds, or one hundred francs, as the French will have it. “I’ll
advance that much on it,” he said, “but don’t ask for another cent
until I’ve had it thoroughly gone over by a plumber. It may have moths
in it.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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