“I tell you, ’Miah,” sniffed Buzzell, “this here job is jest about
played out. A dollar-sixty a day ain’t no livin’ pay for a
hard-workin’ man, and that’s all we git outside commissions on the
fines the jedge imposes, and the deputy sheruff gits the biggest
whack at them. We have to be pacified with what comes outer the
little end o’ the horn. Yis-tidday my share was thutty-two cents,
and so fur to-day we ain’t nabbed only one motor-cycle feller who
come through by accident, havin’ got off the road to Damascus. I’m
gittin’ discouraged.”
Constable Small made a final poke at the pipe bowl, and glanced down
at the complaining individual. “Never knowed you to tackle any job
that you didn’t git discouraged over in a short time, Silas,” he
averred contemptuously. “Gittin’ discouraged is your long suit.
You’ve been discouraged all your life.”
Buzzell moved his slouching shoulders resentfully. “Mebbe that’s so,
’Miah, but I ain’t never had no luck, like some folks. When I was
swore in as constable and put on this job, there was an av’rage of
eighteen or twenty merchines a day that went through town regardless
of speed regerlations. Business was lively, and I sorter guessed my
luck had turned. But now them there automobile fellers has got wise
and sent out warnin’s and posted notices in all the garrages round
about cautionin’ folks to keep away from Greenbush, and they’re
goin’ round by the way of Damascus or Cherryfield, and leavin’ us to
twiddle our thumbs. My opinion, it’s hurt the town, too; Greenbush
is deader’n a salted herrin’.”
Small lifted a broganed foot and struck a match on the leg of his
trousers, after which he held it up until his wheezing pipe was lit.
“Better not go makin’ that kind of talk in the hearin’ of Jedge
Wiggin,” he warned, pulling hard at the rebellious corncob. “If you
done so, he’d tell you what in a hurry, and you’d lose your badge so
quick it’d make your head swim. You know him, Silas. He ain’t got no
use for automobiles nohow, and when he announced that he perposed to
enforce the speed regerlations without fear or favor, he sartainly
meant it. He’d slap a fine onter the President of the United States
if he was to go scootin’ through town faster’n the speed limit
allows.”
“Mebbe he would,” said Buzzell. “He’s so hard-headed and sot it
would be just like him. Jest because he’s alwus been a hoss owner
and a hoss-man, he’s down on automobiles in gen’ral and ev’rybody
that has anything to do with ’em. I reckon that’s _why_he wants to
be representative to the legislator, he wants to go there to put
through some kind of a bill to restrict the use of them merchines to
certain roads so that the drivers of hosses can have the other roads
to themselves. That’s jest how old-fashioned the jedge is.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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