DAM. How? I have discovered his intention to marry, and knowing how nervous he is upon the subject, I have always interfered in time, told him in strong language the evils he was bringing upon his head, brought instances of married misery so plainly before his eyes, that I have frightened him out of his wits; and one morning, eight years ago, he was actually dressed and on his way to church to unite himself to some designing woman, when I luckily met him, and dragged him back again by the collar. MISS SNA. And he had to pay five hundred pounds damages, in an action for breach of promise. DAM. But he purchased independence and happiness with the money. I have been his best friend through life; didn't I go out with him when he was challenged by a young lady's brother, twenty years ago, because I made him relinquish his attentions to her? And though he has been shot at and caned, and has paid damages in two actions for breach of promise, yet by meeting those small evils, he has escaped that far greater one--_a wife;_ and every morning when he rises a free man, I know he invokes a blessing on my head. _(Sits at table, L.)_ MISS SNA. _(Aside.)_ Oh, you monster, you ought to be poisoned. _(Sits R.)_ [_NIGGLE opens folding doors at back, and looks at them._ NIG. Why the deuce don't they go away? What do they want here? Confound them! [_Disappears._ DAM. Where is Niggle? I wish most particularly to see him. Has he shown himself yet? MISS SNA. I have been waiting for him this half hour, to solicit his vote for a beadle. DAM. A beadle! To persuade him to call on the parish clerk, more likely. It wont do, Miss Snare, you don't catch him in _your_ net. _(Aside.)_ Surely it can't be this dangerous woman that he is going to make a fool of himself with. She sha'n't have him--nobody shall have him. [_NIGGLE peeps from doors, again._ NIG. I wish they'd go. DAM. _(Seeing him.)_ Hollo! there you are; come here, sir, and let me examine you. NIG. _(Advancing, C.)_ David, I will no longer allow this continued intrusion on my privacy; and, Miss Snare, I do not wish to offend, but really your continued calls upon _me_, at all hours, are somewhat indecorous. The neighbours begin to talk, and I must check them. What may you want this morning? MISS SNA. I am sure, sir, I was not aware that my friendly visits could cause anybody to talk, or at least be annoying to you; however, I shall not intrude again--you know why I called yesterday. NIG. To give me a pincushion, made by yourself, in the form of a heart. DAM. A dead set at you, John, clear as daylight--a dead set at you. Oh! miss, I'm ashamed of you.