Sink or swim? : $b a novel; vol. 2/3Houstoun, Mrs. (Matilda Charlotte)
General
Sink or swim? : $b a novel; vol. 2/3
Houstoun, Mrs. (Matilda Charlotte)
English fiction -- 19th century
“I haven’t offended you?” he said, looking anxiously at her half-averted
face. “I thought we were friends; I am sorry, so sorry, if I have vexed
you, but you _must_ forgive me. It is so difficult, so impossible, to
see much of anyone--I mean anyone like you--without--without becoming
stupidly confidential; and I could not--indeed I could not--help telling
you how I had missed you when I was away. You see, I am so strangely
situated, so--”
He stopped; it was such dangerous ground that on which he had begun to
tread: he on the very verge of matrimony; and, as it appeared on the
face of things, so entirely guided to that verge by his own wishes and
inclinations. Honor looked up at him in surprise.
“You are going to be married,” she said coldly. “You told me so
yourself, and I have seen the young lady that is to be your wife. She
is rich and pretty, and looks nice and kind. Why do you say that you are
strangely situated?”
“Why,” said Arthur impetuously, “because I should never, no, not for one
single moment, have dreamt of marrying Miss Duberly if I had not been
driven to it by--but,” he went on with a hard bitter laugh, “it sounds
too ridiculous to say by what. You would not believe now, Mrs.
Beacham--you, who know so little of the world, and of what is called
_business_, and of human nature--that I, whom people in general think so
much to be envied, ‘heir to such a splendid property’--young,
prosperous, everything that is most delightful--should be--don’t laugh
if you can help it--marrying for money.”
Again she looked at him, but this time with eyes full of pity and
distress.
“How strange!” she said softly. “No, indeed, I never should have thought
that; I always believed--I always fancied--”
“That I was one of those jolly fellows that can do what they like, and
have everything their own way. How wonderfully you, and everyone else
are mistaken! I should just like--no, I shouldn’t, it would be such a
bitter shame--to have the whole business shown up. I know I must seem
such an awful screw sometimes, such a confounded cur! People must wonder
why I don’t subscribe to charities and asylums, and to the hounds; and,
now--why I marry this girl,--this heiress, who,” he continued as if
talking to himself, “is no connection, has no beauty; while I--well, in
the common course of nature, may expect to live a few years longer--to a
rational age that is--for what is called ‘settling down.’ The truth
is”--and here he lowered his voice, although there was no one within
hearing, to a whisper--“the truth is, that I have no inclination, no
‘call,’ as they say, to marry. If Miss Duberly were the most beautiful
creature that ever breathed, I should feel the same. It is now three
months since I engaged myself to Sophy Duberly, and since then”--with a
glance full of meaning at his companion--“I have had time to discover
that on her account, as well as my own, I have made a grievous and fatal
mistake.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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