Sister Dolorosa, and Posthumous FameAllen, James Lane
Religion
Sister Dolorosa, and Posthumous Fame
Allen, James Lane
Kentucky -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Among the places which had always appealed to her imagination as one of
the heroic sites of Kentucky history was the Convent of the Stricken
Heart, not far away. Whenever she came hither she seemed to be treading
on sacred ground. Happening to visit it one summer day before her
education was completed, she asked to be sent hither for the years that
remained. When these were past, here, with the difficult consent of her
parents, who saw thus perish the last hope of the perpetuation of the
family, she took the white veil. Here at last she hid herself beneath
the black. Her whole character at this stage of its unfolding may be
understood from the name she assumed--Sister Dolorosa. With this name
she wished not merely to extinguish her worldly personality, but to
clothe herself with a lifelong expression of her sympathy with the
sorrows of the world. By this act she believed that she would attain a
change of nature so complete that the black veil of Sister Dolorosa
would cover as in a funeral urn the ashes which had once been the heart
of Pauline Cambron. And thus her conventual life began.
But for those beings to whom the span on the summer-evening cloud is as
nothing compared with that fond arch of beauty which it is a necessity
of their nature to hang as a bow of promise above every beloved
hope--for such dreamers the sadness of life lies in the dissipation of
mystery and the disillusion of truth. When she had been a member of the
order long enough to see things as they were, Sister Dolorosa found
herself living in a large, plain, comfortable brick convent, situated in
a retired and homely region of Southern Kentucky. Around her were plain
nuns with the invincible contrariety of feminine temperament. Before her
were plain duties. Built up around her were plain restrictions. She had
rushed with outstretched arms towards poetic mysteries, and clasped
prosaic reality.
As soon as the lambent flame of her spirit had burned over this new
life, as a fire before a strong wind rushes across a plain, she one day
surveyed it with that sense of reality which sometimes visits the
imaginative with such appalling vividness. Was it upon this dreary waste
that her soul was to play out its drama of ideal womanhood?
She answered the question in the only way possible to such a nature as
hers. She divided her life in twain. Half, with perfect loyalty, she
gave out to duty; the other, with equal loyalty, she stifled within. But
perhaps this is no uncommon lot--this unmating of the forces of the
mind, as though one of two singing-birds should be released to fly forth
under the sky, while the other--the nobler singer--is kept voiceless in
a darkened chamber.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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