Sister Dolorosa, and Posthumous FameAllen, James Lane
Religion
Sister Dolorosa, and Posthumous Fame
Allen, James Lane
Kentucky -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Word had come from the convent that he was wanted there to move a fence
and make changes in the garden, and, proud of the charge, he wished to
go; but certain autumnal work in his own orchard and garden claimed his
time, and hence the trouble. But Gordon, who henceforth had no reason
for tarrying with the old couple, threw himself eagerly upon this
opportunity to do so, and offered his aid in despatching the tasks. So
that thus a few days passed, during which he unconsciously made his way
as far as any one had ever done into the tortuous nature of the old man,
who began to regard him with blind trustfulness.
But they were restless, serious days. One after another passed, and he
heard nothing of Sister Dolorosa. He asked himself whether she were ill,
whether her visits to old Martha had been made to cease; and he shrank
from the thought of bearing away into his life the haunting pain of such
uncertainty. But some inner change constrained him no longer to call her
name. As he sat with the old couple at night the housewife renewed her
talks with him, speaking sometimes of the convent and of Sister
Dolorosa, the cessation of whose visits plainly gave her secret concern;
but he listened in silence, preferring the privacy of his own thoughts.
Sometimes, under feint of hunting, he would take his gun in the
afternoon and stroll out over the country; but always the presence of
the convent made itself felt over the landscape, dominating it, solitary
and impregnable, like a fortress. It began to draw his eyes with a
species of fascination. He chafed against its assertion of barriers, and
could have wished that his own will might be brought into conflict with
it. It appeared to watch him; to have an eye at every window; to see in
him a lurking danger. At other times, borne to him across the darkening
fields would come the sweet vesper bell, and in imagination he would see
her entering the church amid the long procession of novices and nuns,
her hands folded across her breast, her face full of the soft glories of
the lights that streamed in through the pictured windows. Over the
fancied details of her life more and more fondly he lingered.
And thus, although at first he had been interested in her wholly upon
general grounds, believing her secretly unhappy, thus by thinking always
of her, and watching for her, and walking often beside her in his
dreams, with the folly of the young, with the romantic ardour of his
race, and as part of the never-ending blind tragedy of the world, he
came at last to feel for her, among women, that passionate pain of
yearning to know which is to know the sadness of love.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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