Those who affect deafness, are frequently caught in a snare by opening the conversation with them in a very high tone of voice, but gradually sinking it to its usual compass; when, thrown off his guard, the impostor will reply to such questions as are put to him. A recruit, unwilling to go to the East Indies, feigned deafness; he was admitted into the hospital, and put on spoon-diet; for nine days no notice was taken of him. On the tenth the physician, having made signs of inquiry to him, asked the hospital sergeant what diet he was on? the sergeant answered, “Spoon-diet.” The physician, affecting to be angry, said, “Are you not ashamed of yourself, to have kept this man so long on spoon-meat? the poor fellow is nearly starved; let him have a beef-steak and a pint of porter.” Murphy could contain himself no longer; he completely forgot his assumed defect, and, with a face full of gratitude, cried, “God bless your honour! you are the best gentleman I have seen for many a day.” During the insurrection in the Kandian country, in 1818, a private belonging to the 19th regiment was sentry at a post, and was occasionally fired at by the enemy from the neighbouring jungle. Availing himself of what appeared a favourable opportunity for getting invalided and sent home, he placed the muzzle of his musket close to the inside of his left leg, and discharging the piece, he blew away nearly the whole of his calf. He asserted, to those who came to his assistance, that the wound had proceeded from a shot of the enemy’s from the jungle; but the traces of gunpowder found in the leg, told a different tale, as well as his musket, which was recently discharged. A sergeant in the 62d regiment purchased a pistol, and hired a person to shoot him through the arm; hoping, by these means, to make it appear that he had been fired at by one disaffected to the military, and that he should be discharged with a large pension. In this, however, he was disappointed. Even death itself has been simulated. When some officers, in India, were breakfasting in the commander’s tent, the body of a native, said to have been murdered by the sepoys, was brought in and laid down. The crime could not be brought home to any one of them, yet there was the body. A suspicion, however, crossed the adjutant’s mind, and, having the kettle in his hand, a thought struck him that he would pour a little boiling water on the body; he did so; upon which the murdered remains started up, and scampered off. CHAPTER IX. MISCELLANEOUS IMPOSTORS AND IMPOSTURES.