Some Reflections Upon Marriage.: With additions.Astell, Mary
Philosophy
Some Reflections Upon Marriage.: With additions.
Astell, Mary
Marriage; Women -- Social conditions
ordinary Entertainments of her Station, may perhaps seem a desolate
Condition at first, and we may allow her, poor weak Woman! to be
somewhat shock’d at it, since even a wise and courageous Man perhaps
would not keep his Ground. We would conceal (if we could) for the Honour
of the Sex, Mens being baffled and dispirited by a smaller matter, were
not the Instances too frequent and too notorious.
But a little Time wears off all the Uneasiness, and puts her in
possession of Pleasures, which till now she has unkindly been kept a
Stranger to. Affliction, the sincerest Friend, the frankest Monitor, the
best Instructor, and indeed, the only useful School that Women are ever
put to, rouzes her Understanding, opens her Eyes, fixes her Attention,
and diffuses such a Light, such a Joy into her Mind, as not only Informs
her better, but Entertains her more than ever her _Ruel_ did, though
crouded by the Men of Wit. She now distinguishes between Truth and
Appearances, between solid and apparent Good; has found out the
Instability of all earthly Things, and won’t any more be deceived by
relying on them; can discern who are the Flatterers of her Fortune, and
who the Admirers and Encouragers of her Vertue; accounting it no little
Blessing to be rid of those Leeches, who hung upon her only for their
own Advantage. Now sober Thoughts succeed to Hurry and Impertinence, to
Forms and Ceremony; she can secure her Time, and knows how to improve
it; never truly a happy Woman till she came, in the Eye of the World, to
be reckon’d Miserable.
Thus the Husband’s Vices may become an Occasion of the Wife’s Vertues,
and his Neglect do her a more real Good than his Kindness could. But all
injur’d Wives don’t behave themselves after this Fashion, nor can their
Husbands justly expect it. With what Face can he blame her for following
his Example, and being as extravagant on the one Hand, as he is on the
other? Though she cannot justify her Excesses to _GOD_, to the World,
nor to her Self, yet surely in respect of him they may admit of an
Excuse. For to all the rest of his Absurdities, (for Vice is always
unreasonable) he adds one more, who expects that Vertue from another
which he won’t practise himself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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