Black humor; Country life -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Scotland -- Fiction
shrinking from the society into which he is compelled, but with the air
of one who could maintain with ease his part in a higher circle. His
address to Lady Penelope was adapted to the romantic tone of Mr.
Chatterly's epistle, to which it was necessary to allude. He was afraid,
he said, he must complain to Juno of the neglect of Iris, for her
irregularity in delivery of a certain ethereal command, which he had not
dared to answer otherwise than by mute obedience--unless, indeed, as the
import of the letter seemed to infer, the invitation was designed for
some more gifted individual than he to whom chance had assigned it.
Lady Penelope by her lips, and many of the young ladies with their eyes,
assured him there was no mistake in the matter; that he was really the
gifted person whom the nymphs had summoned to their presence, and that
they were well acquainted with his talents as a poet and a painter.
Tyrrel disclaimed, with earnestness and gravity, the charge of poetry,
and professed, that, far from attempting the art itself, he "read with
reluctance all but the productions of the very first-rate poets, and
some of these--he was almost afraid to say--he should have liked better
in humble prose."
"You have now only to disown your skill as an artist," said Lady
Penelope, "and we must consider Mr. Tyrrel as the falsest and most
deceitful of his sex, who has a mind to deprive us of the opportunity of
benefiting by the productions of his unparalleled endowments. I assure
you I shall put my young friends on their guard. Such dissimulation
cannot be without its object."
"And I," said Mr. Winterblossom, "can produce a piece of real evidence
against the culprit."
So saying, he unrolled the sketch which he had filched from Trotting
Nelly, and which he had pared and pasted, (arts in which he was
eminent,) so as to take out its creases, repair its breaches, and vamp
it as well as my old friend Mrs. Weir could have repaired the damages of
time on a folio Shakspeare.
"The vara _corpus delicti_," said the writer, grinning and rubbing his
hands.
"If you are so good as to call such scratches drawings," said Tyrrel, "I
must stand so far confessed. I used to do them for my own amusement; but
since my landlady, Mrs. Dods, has of late discovered that I gain my
livelihood by them, why should I disown it?"
This avowal, made without the least appearance either of shame or
_retenue_, seemed to have a striking effect on the whole society. The
president's trembling hand stole the sketch back to the portfolio,
afraid doubtless it might be claimed in form, or else compensation
expected by the artist. Lady Penelope was disconcerted, like an awkward
horse when it changes the leading foot in galloping. She had to recede
from the respectful and easy footing on which he had contrived to place
himself, to one which might express patronage on her own part, and
dependence on Tyrrel's; and this could not be done in a moment.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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