French fiction -- 20th century -- Translations into English
She did not try to disengage her hands; she smiled and looked at him.
Her clear eyes were fixed upon him and yet did not see him because they
had already gone beyond him. She was looking into herself. She thought,
"This is not even to be discussed? Everything should be discussed! Why
is it impossible? He doesn't displease me. He is a handsome fellow,
attractive, good enough, intelligent, agreeable. How easy life would
be! . . . But I could not live his life with him. He is pleasant, and
everything pleases him. But he respects nothing, men, women, love or
Annette. . . ." (It was she who was speaking, for she saw herself from
outside.) "He is certainly not ungenerous so far as delicate attentions
and social respect are concerned. He gives them to me in good measure.
Perhaps he even treats me with special favor. . . . But what a complete
sceptic! Is there anything he takes seriously? He delights in his
absolute lack of faith in human nature. He discounts its weaknesses with
a complacent and sympathetic curiosity. I think he would be disappointed
if the day came when he was obliged to respect it. A good soul! Yes,
life would be easy with him--so easy that I should no longer have any
reason to live."
Beyond that she no longer put her thought into words. But the thought
pursued her, and her mind was made up.
Franck had let her hands drop. He felt that his cause was lost. He got
up and walked to the window, and with his back to the window-pane he
philosophically lighted a cigarette. He was behind Annette; he saw her
motionless, her arms stretched over the table, as if he were still in
front of her. Her beautiful blond neck and her round shoulders. . . .
Lost! . . . For whom, for what, was she keeping herself? Some new
Brissot-foolishness? No, he knew that Annette's heart was free. Well,
then? She was not cold. She needed to love and be loved!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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