_Scotchman_.--“That traveller seems to be almost as liberal as he who defined _oats_--food for horses in England, and for men in Scotland: such illiberal notions die away of themselves.” _Irishman_.--“Or they are contradicted by more liberal travellers. I am sure my country has great obligations to the gallant English and Scotch military, not only for so readily assisting to defend and quiet us, but for spreading in England a juster notion of Ireland. Within these few months, I suppose, more real knowledge of the state and manners of that kingdom has been diffused in England by their means, than had been obtained during a whole century.” _Scotchman_.--“Indeed, I do not recollect having read any author of note who has given me a notion of Ireland since Spenser and Davies, except Arthur Young.” _Englishman_.--“What little knowledge I have of Ireland has been drawn more from observation than from books. I remember when I first went over there, I did not expect to see twenty trees in the whole island: I imagined that I should have nothing to drink but whiskey, that I should have nothing to eat but potatoes, that I should sleep in mud-walled cabins; that I should, when awake, hear nothing but the Irish howl, the Irish brogue, Irish answers, and Irish bulls; and that if I smiled at any of these things, a hundred pistols would fly from their holsters to _give_ or _demand_ satisfaction. But experience taught me better things: I found that the stories I had heard were _tales of other times_. Their hospitality, indeed, continues to this day.” _Irishman_.--“It does, I believe; but of later days, as we have been honoured with the visits of a greater number of foreigners, our hospitality has become less extravagant.” _Englishman_.--“Not less agreeable: Irish hospitality, I speak from experience, does not now consist merely in pushing about the bottle; the Irish are convivial, but their conviviality is seasoned with wit and humour; they have plenty of good conversation as well as good cheer for their guests; and they not only have wit themselves, but they love it in others; they can take as well as give a joke. I never lived with a more good-humoured, generous, open-hearted people than the Irish.” _Irishman_.--“I wish Englishmen, in general, were half as partial to poor Ireland as you are, sir.” _Englishman_.--“Or rather you wish that they knew the country as well, and then they would do it as much justice.” _Irishman_.--“You do it something more than justice, I fear. There are little peculiarities in my countrymen which will long be justly the subject of ridicule in England.” _Scotchman._--“Not among well-bred and well-informed people: those who have seen or read of great varieties of customs and manners are never apt to laugh at all that may differ from their own. As the sensible author of the Government of the Tongue says, ‘Half-witted people are always the bitterest revilers.’”