He flatters not any one in any way, but speaks the words of truth and
soberness. He is not as the fox in the fable, who commended the singing
of the crow when he wanted something that was in his mouth.
He finds out as far as he can what is the particular _forte_ of
knowledge held by those with whom he talks, and prudently converses upon
it so as to promote mutual edification.
He chooses such words as shall, in the clearest, truest, and most
effective way, embody his thoughts and sentiments.
He speaks the truth in everything, everywhere, and to every one, without
equivocation, prevarication, or unjust hyperbolism.
He avoids all affectation as a thing of the mountebank or pantomime, and
appears himself without a Jezebel's paint or a Jacob's clothing, so that
you may know at once who he is, what he says, and what he means.
He reverences God and Truth, avoiding as demoniacal all profane
swearing, cursing, blasphemy, scoffing, and jeering.
He modulates his voice to suit the company, the subject, and the place
where he talks.
He does not interrupt another in his talk, unless it is immoral, but
hears him through, that he may the better understand him.
He accustoms himself to think before he speaks. As Zeno advises, he dips
his tongue in his mind before he allows it to talk. It is said that a
fool thinks _after_ he has spoken, and a wise man _before_.
He does not pry with a curious and inquisitive spirit into the affairs
of others. If they are wise not to reveal, he is wise not to inquire.
He is no blabber, to divulge secrets committed to his bosom for security
by confiding friendship.
He speaks not evil of the absent, unless in case of self-defence, or as
a witness, or in vindication of righteousness and truth; and when he
does, he adheres closely to fact, and evinces the absence of envy,
malice, or vindictiveness in his motives.
He guards against the exhibition of his own wisdom, knowledge, goodness,
as a boaster or egotist. He is no more a self-flatterer than a flatterer
of others.
He does not mark the failings of those who talk with him or around him
in company, and take them up in carping criticism or biting ridicule.
He does not dogmatize, wrangle, quibble, as though he was an autocrat or
a pugilist. He thinks and lets think. He is as willing for others to
talk their views in their way as he wishes them to be willing that he
should do the same.
He is no censor or grumbler. He remembers that he shall be judged, and
judges not others. In everything he gives thanks. If things and persons
are not as he thinks they should be, he tries to make them better,
rather than spend his words and time in useless complaining.
He is no willow to bend before every breeze of opinion, nor an oak to
stand unmoved in every change of the intellectual atmosphere. He
maintains his conscientious convictions with manly dignity and
independence, but not with a dogged tenacity which snaps at every
resistance, and holds on simply because he will.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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