Tennyson, Alfred Tennyson, Baron, 1809-1892 -- Friends and associates
It was inevitable that the later years of one so aged and so solitary
should be more and more filled with the chronicle and anticipation of
death. But he never sank into lethargy, as the following letter, written
in his eighty-first year, shows:
My own sorrow is indeed continually revived by memories continually
reawakened, not only by the comparatively recent occurrence of my own
temporarily final separation from my best friend--but also by that
bird's-eye--so to speak--retrospect, which carries the imagination
over lovely landscapes of the days of youth--out of the golden morning
light of which emerge, in that unaccountable manner which is quite
involuntary, even the most trivial circumstances--moments of no
moment--yet somehow clothed in a more glittering light than the vast
tracts drowned in the general splendour of the dawn, some tiny
pinnacle that reflects the sun, some far off rillet that gushes out
from the wayside.
Even when in his eighty-fourth year his sight began to fail him and the
loss drove him still more back into his inner life, the old eagerness of
mind remained, though finding a melancholy occupation in noting the
changes to which age was daily subjecting his mental and physical
constitution. The note of hope is, however, ineradicable:
An old man of my great age is already dead--old age being the only
Death--and the faculties which I once possessed receive no impulse, as
of old, for activity--no joyous inspiration. The intellect is cold and
frozen like the mountain streams in Winter, a moonless midnight; and
were it not for the increasing illumination of the immortal spirit
which already beholds the dawn of a greater Day beyond the mountains,
I should indeed be desolate, lost! For I am 84 years of age next
June--and in looking back through my long life--it often seems to me
like a dream--many movements, intellectual and physical, seem to me
like impossibilities. When I see my little grandson Charlie skipping
and hear him shouting and singing, and the light-limbed and
light-hearted girls darting like living lightning down the staircase
(which if I were to attempt to imitate I should undoubtedly break my
neck), I say to myself, is it possible that I can ever have been like
them? Alas! for old age. What can be more mournful than a retrospect
of the days of childhood? But a truce to solemn thoughts--the Spring
is come again, the leaves are unfolding, the birds are singing, the
sun is shining, and surely, next to the human countenance, this is the
most lovely emblem, the most beautiful representative material of
inner spiritualities and the resurrection, and ought to have been so
regarded since the dawn of Christianity; for as sure as Winter
blossoms into Summer, the Winter of old age will spring into the
Eternal Life. Fear not, hope all things! What a contrast to these
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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