The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 14, No. 81, July, 1864: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and PoliticsVarious
General
The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 14, No. 81, July, 1864: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and Politics
Various
American periodicals
"I never talked to any one before, Hetty," he said thoughtfully once, as
we were driving along, after a few moments' silence. "I feel as if I had
got breath, this late in the day, that I never expected, for whatever
thought was in me,--and--whatever love."
He turned away his face, crimson at this. He was as strangely reticent
and tender on some points as a woman. So seldom he put his love into
words! That time I remember how the tears suddenly blinded me, when I
heard him, and my fingers grew unsteady, holding the reins. I was so
happy and proud. But I said nothing: he would not have liked it.
Of one time in his life Doctor Manning had never talked to me: of his
earlier youth; when he was married before. He was not a man of whom you
could ask questions; yet I had hinted an inquiry once or twice in his
presence, but only by a change of color and a strange vague restlessness
had he shown that he understood my drift of meaning. Soon after that,
his eldest son, Robert, came to see his father's new wife, and stayed
with us a day or two. He was a short, thickly built young man, with
heavy jaws and black hair and eyes,--keen eyes, I soon felt, that were
weighing and analyzing me as justly, but more shrewdly than ever his
father had done. The night before he went away he came up to the
porch-step where I sat, and said abruptly,--
"I am satisfied, and happy to go now."
"I am glad of that," I said earnestly; for the tenderness of the son to
the father had touched me.
"Yes. You cannot know the dread I had of seeing you. I knew the risk he
ran in laying his happiness in any woman's hands at his hour of life.
But it was hard he never should know a home and love like other
men,"--his voice unsteady, and with an appealing look.
"He never shall need it," I said, quietly.
"You think not?"--his eyes on the ground. "At all events,"--after a
pause,--"he is resting like a child now: it will not be easy to startle
him to any harsh reality, and," looking up, "I hope God may deal with
you, Mrs. Manning, as you deal with my father. Forgive me," as I began
to speak, "you do not know what this is to me. It makes me rough, I
know. I never yet have forgiven the woman that"----His mother? He caught
the look, stopped, pushed his hair back, caught his breath. "One thing
let me say," after a moment's silence. "You do not know my father. If he
wakens to find his wife is not what he thinks her, it will be too late
for me to warn you then. He has been hurt sore and deeply in his life.
Your chance is but once."
I did not reply to Robert Manning, nor was I offended: there was too
much solemnity in his coarseness. The man's affection for his father was
as part of his life-blood, I believed.
My husband came to me when he saw Robert go, and loosened my hands from
my face. I clung to him as I never did before.
"What is this hurt he talks of in your life, Daniel? Will I be enough to
take it out? Will I?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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