[I felt a great deal better after blowing off the ill-temper condensed in
the above paragraph. To brag little,—to show well,—to crow gently, if in
luck,—to pay up, to own up, and to shut up, if beaten, are the virtues of
a sporting man, and I can’t say that I think we have shown them in any
great perfection of late.]
—Apropos of horses. Do you know how important good jockeying is to
authors? Judicious management; letting the public see your animal just
enough, and not too much; holding him up hard when the market is too full
of him; letting him out at just the right buying intervals; always gently
feeling his mouth; never slacking and never jerking the rein;—this is
what I mean by jockeying.
—When an author has a number of books out a cunning hand will keep them
all spinning, as Signor Blitz does his dinner-plates; fetching each one
up, as it begins to “wabble,” by an advertisement, a puff, or a
quotation.
—Whenever the extracts from a living writer begin to multiply fast in the
papers, without obvious reason, there is a new book or a new edition
coming. The extracts are _ground-bait_.
—Literary life is fun of curious phenomena. I don’t know that there is
anything more noticeable than what we may call _conventional
reputations_. There is a tacit understanding in every community of men
of letters that they will not disturb the popular fallacy respecting this
or that electro-gilded celebrity. There are various reasons for this
forbearance: one is old; one is rich; one is good-natured; one is such a
favorite with the pit that it would not be safe to hiss him from the
manager’s box. The venerable augurs of the literary or scientific temple
may smile faintly when one of the tribe is mentioned; but the farce is in
general kept up as well as the Chinese comic scene of entreating and
imploring a man to stay with you with the implied compact between you
that he shall by no means think of doing it. A poor wretch he must be
who would wantonly sit down on one of these bandbox reputations. A
Prince-Rupert’s-drop, which is a tear of unannealed glass, lasts
indefinitely, if you keep it from meddling hands; but break its tail off,
and it explodes and resolves itself into powder. These celebrities I
speak of are the Prince-Rupert’s-drops of the learned and polite world.
See how the papers treat them! What an array of pleasant kaleidoscopic
phrases, which can be arranged in ever so many charming patterns, is at
their service! How kind the “Critical Notices”—where small authorship
comes to pick up chips of praise, fragrant, sugary, and sappy—always are
to them! Well, life would be nothing without paper-credit and other
fictions; so let them pass current. Don’t steal their chips; don’t
puncture their swimming-bladders; don’t come down on their pasteboard
boxes; don’t break the ends of their brittle and unstable reputations,
you fellows who all feel sure that your names will be household words a
thousand years from now.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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