The Beaux-Stratagem: A comedy in five actsFarquhar, George
General
The Beaux-Stratagem: A comedy in five acts
Farquhar, George
Comedy plays; English drama (Comedy)
_Cher._ Pray, father, don't put me upon getting any thing out of a man;
I'm but young, you know, father, and don't understand wheedling.
_Bon._ Young! why, you jade, as the saying is, can any woman wheedle
that is not young? Your mother was useless at five and twenty! Would you
make your mother a whore, and me a cuckold, as the saying is? I tell
you, silence confesses it, and his master spends his money so freely,
and is so much a gentleman every manner of way, that he must be a
highwayman.
_Enter_ GIBBET, _in a Cloak_.
_Gib._ Landlord! Landlord! is the coast clear?
_Bon._ O, Mr. Gibbet, what's the news?
_Gib._ No matter; ask no questions; all fair and honourable. Here,
my dear Cherry. [_Gives her a Bag._] Two hundred sterling pounds,
as good as ever hanged or saved a rogue; lay them by with the rest.
And here--three wedding, or mourning rings--'tis much the same, you
know----Here, two silver hilted swords; I took those from fellows that
never show any part of their swords but the hilts: here is a diamond
necklace, which the lady hid in the privatest part in the coach, but I
found it out: this gold watch I took from a pawnbroker's wife; it was
left in her hands by a person of quality; there's the arms upon the
case.
_Cher._ But who had you the money from?
_Gib._ Ah! poor woman! I pitied her--from a poor lady, just eloped from
her husband; she had made up her cargo, and was bound for Ireland, as
hard as she could drive: she told me of her husband's barbarous usage,
and so, faith, I left her half a crown. But I had almost forgot, my dear
Cherry; I have a present for you.
_Cher._ What is't?
_Gib._ A pot of ceruse, my child, that I took out of a lady's under
petticoat pocket.
_Cher._ What, Mr. Gibbet, do you think, that I paint?
_Gib._ Why, you jade, your betters do; I am sure, the lady that I took
it from had a coronet upon her handkerchief.----Here, take my cloak, and
go, secure the premises.
_Cher._ I will secure them. [_Exit._
_Bon._ But, harkye, where's Hounslow and Bagshot?
_Gib._ They'll be here to-night.
_Bon._ D'ye know of any other gentlemen o' the pad on this road?
_Gib._ No.
_Bon._ I fancy, that I have two that lodge in the house just now.
_Gib._ The devil! how d'ye smoak them?
_Bon._ Why, the one is gone to church.
_Gib._ To church! that's suspicious, I must confess.
_Bon._ And the other is now in his master's chamber: he pretends to be a
servant to the other; we'll call him out, and pump him a little.
_Gib._ With all my heart.
_Bon._ Mr. Martin! Mr. Martin!
_Enter_ ARCHER, _brushing a Hat, and singing_.
_Gib._ The roads are consumed deep; I'm as dirty as Old Brentford at
Christmas.----A good pretty fellow--Who's servant are you, friend?
_Arch._ My master's.
_Gib._ Really!
_Arch._ Really.
_Gib._ That's much--The fellow has been at the bar, by his
evasions:--But pray, sir, what is your master's name?
Arch. _Tall, all, dall._ [Sings, and brushes the Hat.] This is the
most obstinate spot----
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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