American fiction -- 20th century; Chicago (Ill.) -- Fiction; Journalists -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction
Phyllis’s eyes questioned him fiercely, anxiously.
“I see you’ve heard the story,” he said. “Well, something of that sort
did happen. But—”
“So it’s true!” She said it triumphantly. “I’m so tired of all this talk
that never gets anywhere. You don’t know how much you and Rose-Ann have
meant to me—your marriage. It convinced me that there was something to
modernism after all.”
“So you doubted it—in spite of all Clive’s talk?”
“Yes—I did. Because it was _just_ talk.... Look at me! Do you doubt that
I wanted everything Clive told me about? work—adventure—love.... I’ve
wanted them all along. If Clive had only said, ‘Come with me to
Chicago—’!”
“What _did_ he say?”
“He left it to me to decide.... That was fair enough. If I didn’t have
sense enough to decide by myself—. Only, I think he should have dropped
me, let me alone. He’s been too patient. I’ve lost my respect for him.”
“What do you want him to do—_make_ you marry him?”
“Not now. Three years ago I was foolish enough to believe in marriage. I
couldn’t marry anybody now—least of all Clive: the man who taught me not
to believe in marriage!”
“But you believe in—Rose-Ann’s and my marriage, don’t you?”
“Oh, yes!” There was a wealth of devoutness in her utterance, and her
eyes opened wide as if in astonishment at her belief being questioned.
“Of course. But that’s different.... You two,” she said, a little sadly,
“are the only people in the world that I do believe in,—you and
Rose-Ann. If _you_ went back on me, and I felt that I was making a
mistake in becoming a modern woman, why—” She laughed, and added, “No
doubt my modernism seems ridiculous to you. I admit that it’s only talk,
so far! I—why, I don’t even smoke cigarettes. Clive has been to immense
pains to educate my mind; but my habits are still those of—of my
middle-western childhood. It’s going to be strange.... I _am_ a queer
person. Restless, discontented, fed up on radical theories for three
years.... Do I seem ridiculous to you?”
“No,” Felix said gravely. “Not ridiculous.” He hesitated.... There were
things he wanted to say to her; but _he_ would be ridiculous, saying
those things. And yet he did want to say them.... Her hand lay near him
on the couch. He covered it with his own. The touch gave him the
encouragement he needed; but when he spoke it was in unpremeditated
words.
“I’m awfully sorry, Phyllis,” he said.
2
For a moment her flippant hardness disappeared. She became for a moment,
in response to his tone, the girl he had first known—the real person,
simple and genuine, that still underlay all her pretences.... She let
her hand rest in his for a moment, and then withdrew it. “Why sorry?”
she asked quietly. “I’m sorry for myself; but why should you be sorry
for me, Felix?”
“I don’t know,” Felix said. “But—I like you, and I want you to be happy.
And Clive’s modernism doesn’t seem to me to be what you want.”
She frowned at him. “What _do_ I want?” she asked.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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