United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Fiction
“That depends on the way those are commanded whose business it is to
break them,” growled Old Grumps. “I don’t say but what we are rightly
commanded,” he added, remembering his duty to superiors. “I concede and
acknowledge that our would-be Brigadier knows his military business. But
the blessing of God, Wallis! I believe in Waldron as a soldier. But as a
man and a Christian, faugh!”
Gildersleeve had clearly emptied his canteen unassisted; he never talked
about Christianity when perfectly sober.
“What was your last remark?” inquired Wallis, taking his pipe from his
mouth to grin. Even a superior officer might be chaffed a little in the
darkness.
“I made no last remark,” asserted the Colonel with dignity. “I’m not
a-dying yet. If I said anything last it was a mere exclamation of
disgust--the disgust of an officer and gentleman. I suppose you know
something about our would-be Brigadier. I suppose you think you know
something about him.”
“Bet you I know _all_ about him,” affirmed Wallis. “He enlisted in the
Old Tenth as a common soldier. Before he had been a week in camp they
found that he knew his biz, and they made him a sergeant. Before we
started for the field the Governor got his eye on him and shoved him
into a lieutenancy. The first battle h’isted him to a captain. And
the second--bang! whiz! he shot up to colonel right over the heads of
everybody, line and field. Nobody in the Old Tenth grumbled. They saw
that he knew his biz. I know _all_ about him. What’ll you bet?”
“I’m not a betting man, Lieutenant, except in a friendly game of poker,”
sighed Old Grumps. “You don’t know anything about your Brigadier,” he
added in a sepulchral murmur, the echo of an empty canteen. “I have only
been in this brigade a month, and I know more than you do, far, very far
more, sorry to say it. He’s a reformed clergyman. He’s an apostatized
minister.” The Colonel’s voice as he said this was solemn and sad enough
to do credit to an undertaker. “It’s a bad sort, Wallis,” he continued,
after another deep sigh, a very highly perfumed one, the sigh of a
barkeeper. “When a clergyman falls, he falls for life and eternity,
like a woman or an angel. I never knew a backslidden shepherd to come
to good. Sooner or later he always goes to the devil, and takes down
whomsoever hangs to him.”
“He’ll take down the Old Tenth, then,” asserted Wallis. “It hangs to
him. Bet you two to one he takes it along.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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