England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Science fiction; Time travel -- Fiction
“No, not exactly what you call an Englishman,” the stranger replied,
as if he didn't quite care for such clumsy attempts to examine his
antecedents. “As I tell you, I'm an Alien. But we always spoke English
at home,” he added with an afterthought, as if ready to vouchsafe all
the other information that lay in his power.
“You can't be an American, I'm sure,” Philip went on, unabashed, his
eagerness to solve the question at issue, once raised, getting the
better for the moment of both reserve and politeness.
“No, I'm certainly not an American,” the stranger answered with a gentle
courtesy in his tone that made Philip feel ashamed of his rudeness in
questioning him.
“Nor a Colonist?” Philip asked once more, unable to take the hint.
“Nor a Colonist either,” the Alien replied curtly. And then he relapsed
into a momentary silence which threw upon Philip the difficult task of
continuing the conversation.
The member of Her Britannic Majesty's Civil Service would have given
anything just that minute to say to him frankly, “Well, if you're not an
Englishman, and you're not an American, and you're not a Colonist,
and you ARE an Alien, and yet you talk English like a native, and have
always talked it, why, what in the name of goodness do you want us to
take you for?” But he restrained himself with difficulty. There was
something about the stranger that made him feel by instinct it would be
more a breach of etiquette to question him closely than to question any
one he had ever met with.
They walked on along the road for some minutes together, the stranger
admiring all the way the golden tresses of the laburnum and the rich
perfume of the lilac, and talking much as he went of the quaintness and
prettiness of the suburban houses. Philip thought them pretty, too
(or rather, important), but failed to see for his own part where the
quaintness came in. Nay, he took the imputation as rather a slur on so
respectable a neighbourhood: for to be quaint is to be picturesque, and
to be picturesque is to be old-fashioned. But the stranger's voice and
manner were so pleasant, almost so ingratiating, that Philip did
not care to differ from him on the abstract question of a qualifying
epithet. After all, there's nothing positively insulting in calling a
house quaint, though Philip would certainly have preferred, himself, to
hear the Eligible Family Residences of that Aristocratic Neighbourhood
described in auctioneering phrase as “imposing,” “noble,” “handsome,” or
“important-looking.”
Just before they reached Miss Blake's door, the Alien paused for a
second. He took out a loose handful of money, gold and silver together,
from his trouser pocket. “One more question,” he said, with that
pleasant smile on his lips, “if you'll excuse my ignorance. Which of
these coins is a pound, now, and which is a sovereign?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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