Something in Edgar broke in two as the man, whom in spite of everything
he still idolized, slighted him like that. A bitter despair filled his
heart when the baron left without so much as touching him with his cloak
or saying a single word, when he, Edgar, was conscious of having done no
wrong. His painfully enforced self-restraint gave way, the too heavy
burden of dignity that he had imposed upon himself dropped from his
narrow little shoulders, and he became the child again, small and
humble, as he had been the day before. At the top of the steps he
confronted the baron and said in a strained voice, thick with suppressed
tears:
"What have I done to you that you don't notice me any more? Why are you
always like this with me now? And mamma, too? Why are you always sending
me off? Am I a nuisance to you, or have I done anything to offend you?"
The baron was startled. There was something in the child's voice that
upset him at first, then stirred him to tenderness and sympathy for the
unsuspecting boy.
"You're a goose, Eddie. I'm merely out of sorts to-day. You're a dear
boy, and I really love you." He tousled Edgar's hair, yet with averted
face so as not to be obliged to see those great moist, beseeching
child's eyes. The comedy he was playing was becoming painful. He was
beginning to be ashamed of having trifled so insolently with the child's
love. That small voice, quivering with suppressed sobs, cut him to the
quick. "Go upstairs now, Eddie. We'll get along together this evening
just as nicely as ever, you'll see."
"You won't let mamma send me right off to bed, will you?"
"No, no, I won't, Eddie," the baron smiled. "Just go on up. I must dress
for dinner."
Edgar went, made happy for the moment. Soon, however, the hammer began
to knock at his heart again. He was years older since the day before. A
strange guest, Distrust, had lodged itself in his child's breast.
He waited for the decisive test, at table. Nine o'clock came, and his
mother had not yet said a word about his going to bed. Why did she let
him stay on just that day of all days, she who was usually so exact? It
bothered him. Had the baron told her what he had said! He was consumed
with regret, suddenly, that he had run after the baron so trustingly. At
ten o'clock his mother rose, and took leave of the baron, who, oddly,
showed no surprise at her early departure and made no attempt to detain
her as he usually did. The hammer beat harder and harder at Edgar's
breast.
Now he must apply the test with exceeding care. He, too, behaved as
though he suspected nothing and followed his mother to the door.
Actually, in that second, he caught a smiling glance that travelled over
his head straight to the baron and seemed to indicate a mutual
understanding, a secret held in common. So the baron had betrayed him!
That was why his mother had left so early. He, Edgar, was to be lulled
with a sense of security so that he would not get in their way the next
day.
"Mean!" he murmured.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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