He ended with: "Mind you decide for yourself. That's the great thing in
life. Don't you believe anything that any one tells you. See for
yourself. And if there's something of great value, don't think the less
of it because the people who admire it aren't worth very much. Why
should they be? And possibly after all it's only themselves they're
admiring ... There's a fearful lot of nonsense and humbug in this
thing, but there's something real too ..."
He changed his note, suddenly addressing himself intently to her as
though he had a message to deliver.
"Don't think me impertinent. But your Aunt Anne. See as much of her as
you can. She's devoted to you, Miss Cardinal. You mayn't have seen
it--she's a reserved woman and very shy of her feelings, but she's
spoken to me ... I hope I'm not interfering to say this, but perhaps at
first you don't understand her. She loves you, you're the first human
being I do believe that she's ever loved."
What was there then in Maggie that started up in rebellion at this
unexpected declaration? She had been sitting there, tranquil, soothed
with a happy sense that her new life was developing securely for her in
the way that she would have it. Suddenly she was alert, suspicious,
hostile.
"What has she said to you?" she asked quickly, frowning up at him and
drawing back as though she were afraid of him. He was startled at the
change in her.
"Said?" he repeated, stammering a little. "Why only ... Nothing ...
except that she cared for you and hoped that you would be happy. She
was afraid that it would all be strange for you at first ... Perhaps I
have been interfering ..."
"No," Maggie interrupted quickly. "Not you. Only I must lead my own
life. I must, mustn't I? I don't want to be selfish, but I can begin
for myself now. I have a little money of my own--and I MUST make my own
way. I don't want to be selfish," she repeated, "but I must be free. I
don't understand Aunt Anne. She never seems to care for me. I want to
do everything for her I can, but I don't want to be under any one ever
any more."
She was so young when she said this that he was suddenly moved to an
affectionate fatherly tenderness--but he knew her now too well to show
it.
"No, you mustn't be selfish," he answered her almost drily. "We can't
lead our lives quite alone, you know--every step we take we affect some
one somewhere. Your aunt doesn't want your liberty--she wants your
affection."
"She wants to make me religious," Maggie brought out, staring at Mr.
Magnus.
"Ah, if you see that, you don't understand her," he answered. "How
should you--yet? She cares so deeply for her religion that she wishes
naturally any one whom she loves to share it with her. But if you
don't--"
"If you don't?" cried Maggie, springing up from her seat and facing him.
"I'm sure she would wish to influence no one," he continued gravely.
"You've seen for yourself how apart her life is. She is too conscious
of the necessity for her own liberty--"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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