London (England) -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
He was only a quarter of an hour with the girl, but this gave him time to
take the measure of it. After he had spoken to her about her
bereavement, very much as an especially mild missionary might have spoken
to a beautiful Polynesian, he let her know that he had learned from her
companions the very strong step she was about to take. This led to their
spending together ten minutes which, to her mind, threw more light on his
character than anything that had ever passed between them. She had
always felt with him as if she were standing on an edge, looking down
into something decidedly deep. To-day the impression of the
perpendicular shaft was there, but it was rather an abyss of confusion
and disorder than the large bright space in which she had figured
everything as ranged and pigeon-holed, presenting the appearance of the
labelled shelves and drawers at a chemist’s. He discussed without an
invitation to discuss, he appealed without a right to appeal. He was
nothing but a suitor tolerated after dismissal, but he took strangely for
granted a participation in her affairs. He assumed all sorts of things
that made her draw back. He implied that there was everything now to
assist them in arriving at an agreement, since she had never informed him
that he was positively objectionable; but that this symmetry would be
spoiled if she should not be willing to take a little longer to think of
certain consequences. She was greatly disconcerted when she saw what
consequences he meant and at his reminding her of them. What on earth
was the use of a lover if he was to speak only like one’s grandmother and
one’s aunt? He struck her as much in love with her and as particularly
careful at the same time as to what he might say. He never mentioned her
mother; he only alluded, indirectly but earnestly, to the “step.” He
disapproved of it altogether, took an unexpectedly prudent, politic view
of it. He evidently also believed that she would be dragged down; in
other words that she would not be asked out. It was his idea that her
mother would contaminate her, so that he should find himself interested
in a young person discredited and virtually unmarriageable. All this was
more obvious to him than the consideration that a daughter should be
merciful. Where was his religion if he understood mercy so little, and
where were his talent and his courage if he were so miserably afraid of
trumpery social penalties? Rose’s heart sank when she reflected that a
man supposed to be first-rate hadn’t guessed that rather than not do what
she could for her mother she would give up all the Engineers in the
world. She became aware that she probably would have been moved to place
her hand in his on the spot if he had come to her saying “Your idea is
the right one; put it through at every cost.” She couldn’t discuss this
with him, though he impressed her as having too much at stake for her to
treat him with mere disdain. She sickened at the revelation that a
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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