“Yet it is hardest,” the Bishop’s face showed a passing shadow, as he
looked inward upon past struggles and forward to that next interview
of his Christmas Day, “to forgive those who hurt _Him_, His work. Yet
he forgave even that, upon His cross. When we remember that, I do
not know how I--how we--_dare_ not to forgive.” He paused, while his
fingers on the black knobs tightened, then the shadow of his face was
struck away by the quick sunshine of reassurance. He looked toward
Mrs. Graham, “You see,” he said, “it seems to me that if God in all
His eternity has no time to be stern, then perhaps we--who have such
a little while! have no time for anything but loving. Don’t you,” he
pleaded, “don’t you think so, too?”
The ruddiness had paled from her cheeks. She was looking at him with
wide, intense eyes.
“That’s your way, Bishop. But it’s what I couldn’t--ever climb up
to,--I guess.” She had to fight to speak, against her choking breath,
“I’m one of those you’ll have to forgive, I’m afraid, for not doing
what you want. I wish I could, on your account. But it don’t seem as if
I could make up with Florence. But I can’t bear that you should look
like that, Bishop,--disappointed! Don’t, please don’t, mind! It’s just
that I’m a mother who’s lost her boy, and wants him back and can’t get
him, him and his baby!”
“And yet,” he answered, “they are all there, all ready for you,
waiting, wanting you, all there! It is, it is, too bad!”
“Florence!” she whispered.
“Needing and wanting you most of all. Seeing, by the way her little one
needs her, how much she needs a mother. Perhaps mothering is your way
of forgiving. Couldn’t you try it? Florence has never had a chance, has
she, to learn many things, if she has been a motherless girl? Perhaps
she did hate you once. I don’t believe she hates anyone now. It’s very
hard to hate when there’s a baby in the house. She sent the picture.
She needs you. She knows she needs you, for she knows now what a child
can miss who has no mother. Let us think of all she has missed, and not
be too hard on her, you and I, any more.”
She was silent, one hand tense upon the curtain cord.
“It’s such a good day to go,” he urged, “such a good day to do the
unexpected, Christmas! Everyone expects the unexpected, on Christmas.”
A comical smile worked on her set face, “You do, anyway, Bishop!” she
said with a catch in the throat.
“I think I did allow myself to expect this,” he answered, “this
making-up. Perhaps I expected it because I wanted it so, for I’ve been
in such a hurry somehow, about that baby. Why, he’ll be growing up,
while we’re still talking. You have three-quarters of an hour,” he
glanced at the clock in quick remembrance of the visit to Dr. Newbold
before church-time, “and you’ll go?”
He waited.
She was silent still, until she burst out, “I can’t! I’d say ‘yes’ if
I could, when you beg me so. But I can’t say it, and I’ve got to be
honest with you. I can’t say it!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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