His voice ceased, weary. His face looked forth from the shadow depths,
worn to silver-white by all the years, then, even as he paused, hope
ran across it a bright transforming hand.
“It cannot be true! It need not be true! Need it, Lucy? I seem to
see--forgive me one more dream,--Murray with you to help him, still
keeping Westbury the Westbury of our youth. Of our youth! The old
customs, the way of graceful living, you have kept! And now to keep
the spirit, the spirit of the place, its simple godliness, its simple
friendliness! It has seemed to me God’s ground, where He let me walk a
little while and serve and then pass on, hoping! Hoping, Lucy?
“For you, there is so much left!” he spoke a bit wistfully. “Such
vigor still and life left in you! It does not matter if the years left
are few and late, if they can be so strong and beautiful! While, as
for me--” he shook his head, shrugging his shoulders, smiling, “oh,
these poor old bodies that we wear, how they fetter and confine! Yet
we mustn’t scorn them too much either, poor things, when they’ve done
their best for us for eighty years!”
Something in her listening face recalled him, “Dear me, I am at it
again! Troubling you again with the things that shall come after. It
was only that I saw before you for a moment--so much! I seem to see
so much everywhere, to-day. And yet much of it is sadly jumbled. Your
brain never seems to play these sorry tricks on you. You’re feeling
patient still, aren’t you,” he smiled, “while I try still to remember
and understand?”
Slowly keenness grew in his gaze upon her face, mute before him and
subtle. His words were a little hesitant, “I do not believe it is quite
true, that figure of a portrait. It hurts us both to think about that
portrait, because it is not true. Truly, I think my idea was better
than that, that you are the spirit of the place. Yes, I prefer my
figure of speech to yours, and so I shall keep it and forget yours. We
have known each other too long to believe in that portrait,--it’s such
a lonesome notion, somehow! Perhaps you feel like a portrait yourself
sometimes when you’re sitting alone by the fire and feeling a little
down, as we all do sometimes, I’m afraid, but you surely couldn’t
expect me to believe you a picture in a frame when for a lifetime
you’ve seemed life and energy to me! So remember,” an instant his voice
grew lower, “always remember--” the old twinkle showed, “that I don’t
believe a word of it!”
He knew that her eyes, at full gaze on him, frankly showed all secrets,
but they were secrets he was not sure he read. Still he was trying to
understand, while he paused for help.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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