The City Bride (1696): Or, The Merry CuckoldHarris, Joseph
General
The City Bride (1696): Or, The Merry Cuckold
Harris, Joseph
English drama
[_Exeunt._
SCENE II.
_Enter_ Friendly solus.
_Fri._ Was ever Fortune like to this of mine? Who for the Smile of a
vile simple Woman, have acted thus against my very Soul, all to please a
Creature, whose next Command perhaps will higher mount, it may be light
on my self, as now it did on _Bonvile_.
_Enter_ Clara.
_Cla._ Ha! _Friendly_ here alone. Now, now, my Fears begin.
[_Aside_.
So, Sir, you are return'd I see.
[_To him._
_Fri._ Madam, I am, and like those noble Knights in former times, after
subduing all their Ladies Foes, returning with the joyful News of
Conquest, receive her trembling to their longing Arms, and claim her as
their own, so I----.
_Cla._ What mean you, Sir?
_Fri._ Madam, You are obeyed, your hard Commands fulfilled; at your
Request I've kill'd my Friend, nay and my best of Friends.
_Cla._ How? kill'd your Friend for me.
_Fri._ Indeed 'tis true.
_Cla._ Then thou art truly wretched: But say, say quickly, who's this
unhappy Man whom thy Mistake hath thus untimely kill'd?
_Fri._ _Bonvile._
_Cla._ _Bonvile_ said you? My Blood with an unusual Course runs backward
from my Heart! Horror has seiz'd my Soul! A thick-black Mist has
overcast my Sight, and I am not the same: but speak, O speak again, Was
it _Bonvile_?
_Fri._ Why shou'd you seek to iterate my Guilt, by a Rehearsal of that
dreadful Name? Too sure, alas! It was: _Bonvile_'s the Friend I've
kill'd.
_Cla._ Curs'd be the Tongue that spoke it, but doubly curs'd the Hand
that did the barbarous Fact.
_Fri._ Why Madam, was it not your Command to kill my Friend; nay more,
my best of Friends?
_Cla._ Yes, and I thought my self your best of Friends.
_Fri._ I hope you wou'd not have had me murder'd you?
_Cla._ No, Monster, no.
_Fri._ These are Riddles.
_Cla._ Fool, our whole Sex is made of nothing else: Thou mayst sooner
untie the Gordian Knot, expound the Problems of the monstrous _Sphynx_,
and read what is decreed in the mysterious Book of Fate, than unfold a
Woman's sly malitious Meaning.
_Fri._ Very well; she first set me on to do this most accurs'd of Deeds,
and now upbraids me; nay wou'd hang me for 't: These are the Tricks of
all her damning Sex. O Woman, Woman, Woman, dear devilish Woman,
farewel.
[_Offers to go._
_Cla._ Stay _Friendly_, all I have said was only to try your Constancy;
and whether you'd repent of what you've done. But tell me truly, is
_Bonvile_ surely dead?
_Fri._ Indeed he is.
_Cla._ 'Tis bravely done, and I adore thee for 't. By Heaven I love thee
now, even unto Dotage!
_Fri._ Was ever Change like this? The subtlest Labyrinth Wit cou'd ere
invent, affords not half so many Turnings as a Woman's Mind.
[_Aside._
What mean you, Madam, by this seeming Transport?
_Cla._ O _Friendly_, _Friendly_, I am all o're Extasy! Thou hast done a
Deed that ravishes my Soul. At once thou hast kill'd my dear and only
Friend, and slain the fatal'st Enemy I had.
_Fri._ What more Riddles Madam, pray explain your self.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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