The Clicking of CuthbertWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Clicking of Cuthbert
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Golf stories; Humorous stories
"I appeal to the judges."
"Very well. We will leave it to the judges."
I consulted with Rupert Bailey. It seemed to me that Arthur Jukes was
entitled to the verdict. Rupert, who, though an amiable and delightful
companion, had always been one of Nature's fat-heads, could not see it.
We had to go back to our principals and announce that we had been
unable to agree.
"This is ridiculous," said Ralph Bingham. "We ought to have had a third
judge."
At this moment, who should come out of the hotel but Amanda Trivett! A
veritable goddess from the machine.
"It seems to me," I said, "that you would both be well advised to leave
the decision to Miss Trivett. You could have no better referee."
"I'm game," said Arthur Jukes.
"Suits _me_," said Ralph Bingham.
"Why, whatever are you all doing here with your golf-clubs?" asked the
girl, wonderingly.
"These two gentlemen," I explained, "have been playing a match, and a
point has arisen on which the judges do not find themselves in
agreement. We need an unbiased outside opinion, and we should like to
put it up to you. The facts are as follows:..."
Amanda Trivett listened attentively, but, when I had finished, she
shook her head.
"I'm afraid I don't know enough about the game to be able to decide a
question like that," she said.
"Then we must consult St. Andrews," said Rupert Bailey.
"I'll tell you who might know," said Amanda Trivett, after a moment's
thought.
"Who is that?" I asked.
"My _fiance_. He has just come back from a golfing holiday. That's
why I'm in town this morning. I've been to meet him. He is very good at
golf. He won a medal at Little-Mudbury-in-the-Wold the day before he
left."
There was a tense silence. I had the delicacy not to look at Ralph or
Arthur. Then the silence was broken by a sharp crack. Ralph Bingham had
broken his mashie-niblick across his knee. From the direction where
Arthur Jukes was standing there came a muffled gulp.
"Shall I ask him?" said Amanda Trivett.
"Don't bother," said Ralph Bingham.
"It doesn't matter," said Arthur Jukes.
8
_The Heel of Achilles_
On the young man's face, as he sat sipping his ginger-ale in the
club-house smoking-room, there was a look of disillusionment. "Never
again!" he said.
The Oldest Member glanced up from his paper.
"You are proposing to give up golf once more?" he queried.
"Not golf. Betting on golf." The Young Man frowned. "I've just been let
down badly. Wouldn't you have thought I had a good thing, laying seven
to one on McTavish against Robinson?"
"Undoubtedly," said the Sage. "The odds, indeed, generous as they are,
scarcely indicate the former's superiority. Do you mean to tell me that
the thing came unstitched?"
"Robinson won in a walk, after being three down at the turn.
"Strange! What happened?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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