PH.—The pocopo is a small Brazilian animal, chiefly remarkable for singularity of diet. A pocopo eats nothing but other pocopos. As these are not easily obtained, the annual mortality from starvation is very great. As a result, there are fewer mouths to feed, and by consequence the race is rapidly multiplying. F.—From whom had you this? PH.—A professor of political economy. F.—Let us rise and uncover. —————— FOOL—A foreign student of the English language read the report of a colloquy between a fool and a philosopher. The remarks of the fool were indicated by the letter F; those of the philosopher by the letters PH—as ours will be if Heaven raise up a great, wise man to report them. PHILOSOPHER—Well? F.—Nothing. Ever thereafter the misguided foreign student spelled “fool” with ph and philosopher with an f. PH.—Neo-Platonist! —————— II FOOL—If I were a doctor— DOCTOR—I should endeavor to be a fool. F.—You would fail—folly is not achieved, but upon the meritorious it is conferred. D.—For what purpose? F.—For yours. —————— FOOL—I have a friend who— DOCTOR—Is in need of my assistance. Absence of excitement, absolute quiet, a hard bed and a simple diet; that will cure him. F.—Hardly. He is dead—he is taking your prescription. D.—All but the simple diet. F.—He is himself the diet. D.—How simple. —————— FOOL—What is the nastiest medicine? DOCTOR—A fool’s advice. F.—And what the most satisfactory disease? D.—The most lingering one. F.—To the patient, I mean. D.—Paralysis of the thoracic duct. F.—I am not familiar with it. D.—It does not encourage familiarity. Paralysis of the thoracic duct enables the patient to overeat without taking the edge off his appetite. F.—What an admirable equipment for dining out! How long does the patient’s unnatural appetite last? D.—The time varies; always longer than he does. F.—As an hypothesis, that is imperfectly conceivable. It sounds like a doctrine. —————— DOCTOR—Anything further? FOOL—You attend a patient; nevertheless he recovers. How do you tell if his recovery was because of your treatment or in spite of it? D.—I never do tell. F.—I mean, how do you know? D.—I take the opinion of a person interested in such matters: I ask a fool. F.—How does the patient know? D.—The fool asks me. F.—You are very kind; how shall I prove my ingratitude? D.—By close attention to the laws of health. F.—God forbid! —————— III FOOL—Sir Cutthroat, how many orphans have you made to-day? SOLDIER—The devil an orphan. Have you a family? F.—Put up your iron; I am the last of my race. S.—What!—no more fools? F.—Not one, so help me! They have all gone to the wars. By the way, you are somewhat indebted to me.