The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 12: In MotleyBierce, Ambrose
General
The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 12: In Motley
Bierce, Ambrose
American literature
So reading, I fell asleep, for I was full of bird. Straight appeared to
me an angel, the dexter half of whom was white, the sinister, black—the
line of division parting him from the hair down. Two skins of wine
he bore; one wine was clear and sweet, and one was dark and bitter
exceeding, such as would make a pig squeal. I saw, also, at his feet as
he stood, some large glass vessels of even size, marked from bottom to
top with a scale, the divisions numbered upward from 1 to 100.
“Son of Mortality,” said he, “I am the Compounding Power—behold my
standard mixture.” So saying he poured into one of the vessels 50 parts
of sweet and the same of bitter. “This,” he said, “is without taste.
It is for him whom Heaven doth neither bless nor afflict. There is but
one such that liveth.”
“The devil!” I cried, for indeed I greatly marveled that this should be
so.
Said the angel: “Guess again.”
“Compound now, I beseech thee,” I said, “the best that thou hast use
for in thy business: a tipple of surpassing richness—one which maketh
the hair to curl.”
Thereupon he put into the second vessel 1 part of bitter and 9 of
sweet. And he looked upon it saying: “It is the best that it is
permitted to me to do.”
“Show me,” I said, “the worst; for truly it must be exceeding fierce,
slaying at eighty rods.”
“It is bad to take,” he answered, and straightway poured into the third
vessel 10 parts of sweet. Then, upraising the other skin, he filled
the vessel to the brim, and a great compassion fell upon my spirit,
thinking on the unhappy man who should get himself outside that unholy
tope.
“Behold,” said the angel, “Heaven is just! The ratio of pain to joy in
the lot of the happiest mortal is the same as that of joy to pain in
his who is most wretched. It is 1 to 10.” And after some little time
he spake again:
“I’m a dandy for fairness.”
“True, O Dandy Allotter,” I said: “the proportions are only reversed.
But these two vessels, the second and the third, holding the good
draught and the bad—lo! the good is but a tenth part full, whilst the
latter overfloweth the vessel. Is each quantity a dose?”
And the angel said: “Each is a dose.”
Wherefore I raised my voice against him, and called him out of his
name, and cast my pillow upon him, and he departed out of that place
with a loud cry. Then they that came in haste to my chamber, unbidden,
looked one upon another and said: “He ate of the bird.”
LACKING FACTORS
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