The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
At the opening of the spring, the French king advanced again towards
Paris with two prophetesses in his suite, but, as two of a trade never
agree--particularly if they happen to be of the gentler sex--the two
young ladies were constantly quarrelling. It is probable that the
presence of Catherine was the cause of putting Joan upon her mettle, for
she marched to the relief of Compiegne with all her accustomed spirit.
She had made up her mind to a repetition of the hit she had made at
Orleans, but Victory did not answer her call or show any disposition to
wait upon her. Joan fought with valour, but her soldiers had no sooner
met the foe than they agreed that the chances were against them, and
that the only way to bring themselves round was to turn immediately
back, a manouvre which was performed by one simultaneous movement. Joan
tried to rally them, but they were too far gone, and while she kept her
face to the enemy, her old disaster befell her, for she backed into one
of those ditches in which all her military exploits seemed doomed to
ter-minate. There being no humane member of society, or member of the
Humane Society, to give her the benefit of a drag from the water in
which she was immersed, she was soon surrounded by her enemies. Her own
companions had fled into the city and shut the gates upon her, against
which she had not the strength to knock, when, mournfully murmuring
out, "Alas! I am not worth a rap," she surrendered to her opponents. The
sensation created by the capture of Joan of Arc was actually prodigious.
The captains ran out of their positions, and the men left their ranks to
have a peep at her. Duke Philip paid her a visit at her lodgings, in the
presence of old Monstrelet, who was either so deaf, or so stupid, or so
thunderstruck, that he could not relate what passed at the interview.
The ungrateful French made no effort to release the Maid, and, indeed,
there seemed to be a feeling of satisfaction at having got rid of her.
Her captors showed a strong disposition to make much of her by turning
the celebrated prophetess to a profit, and the person to whom she had
surrendered--the Bastard of Vendôme--sold her out and out to John of
Luxembourgh. Friar Martin pretended to have a lien upon her; but John,
refusing to have the lot put up again, and resold--in accordance with
the usual practice in cases of dispute--cleared her off to a strong
castle of his own in Picardy. Another pretended mortgagee of the Maid
then started up in the person of the Bishop of Beauvais, who claimed her
on behalf of the University of Paris. John of Luxembourgh disposed
of her to his holiness for ten thousand francs, rather than have any
further trouble.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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