The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
When Edward saw what was going on he thought it high time for himself to
be going off, and, with a few adherents who had not a change of linen in
their trunks nor a penny in their purses, he got into a ship bound for
Holland. The king himself had no money to pay his passage, and
offered the captain, says Comines, "a gown lined with martens," as
a remuneration for his services. Edward fled to Burgundy, where he
persuaded the duke to advance a trifle in the way of ships, money, and
men, with which the ousted monarch landed at Ravenspur. On his first
arrival the people held back, saying, "Oh, here's the old business over
again. We've had enough of this," and employing other expressions of
discouragement. He, however, declared he had no intention of unsettling
anything or anybody--except his bills, which remained unsettled as a
matter of course--and was allowed to enter the capital, where he was
once more proclaimed sovereign. It is an old commercial principle in
this country, that debt is a sign of prosperity, and Edward's success
has been attributed to the fact of his owing vast sums to the London
merchants. They were, of course, interested in the well-being of their
debtor, and the hypothesis was thus proved to be true, that he who is
worse off is in a better position than he who is well-to-do, and the man
whose circumstances are tolerably straight, is not so eligibly situated
as the individual whose affairs are materially straightened. Edward,
though not in clover, was obliged to be in the field, for Warwick fell
upon his rear with alarming vehemence. They fought at Barnet on the 14th
of April, 1471, in the midst of a mist, when poor Warwick was not
only lost in the fog, but many of his friends were killed, and Edward
obtained a decisive victory. The particulars of this battle have never
been very accurately given, for the fog and the old chroniclers were
almost equally dense; and between them the affair is involved in much
obscurity.
[Illustration: 320]
It is easier to quell sixty thousand men than to subdue one troublesome
woman, and Queen Margaret still gave "a deal of trouble" to the
conqueror. She, however, ultimately fell into his hands, together with
her son--one of the "rising generation" of that time--who, on being
asked by Edward what he meant by entering the realm in arms,
replied pertly, "I came to preserve my father's crown and my own
inheritance."--"Did you, indeed, you young jackanapes?" cried Edward,
"then take that," and he flicked the boy's nose with the thumb of a
large gauntlet. The child set up a piercing yell, but this was not the
worst of it, for some attendants, excited by the brutal example of their
master, gave the lad a blow or two, which finished him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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