The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
the usual Ratcliffe highway; but their repudiation had no effect, for
one of them was at once beheaded. Sir William Stanley, a very old
friend of the Richmond family, whose brother, Lord Stanley, had put
the battered crown on Henry's brow in the field of Bosworth, became an
object of suspicion; and thinking he should get off by a confession,
he acknowledged everything he had been guilty of, with a supplement
containing a catalogue of offences he had never committed. Thus, by
denying too much for confession and owning enough for condemnation, he
fell between two stools, one of which was the stool of repentance, and
lost his head at the moment he fancied he was upon a safe footing.
The party of Perkin Warbeck being discouraged by these events, and the
people of Flanders having grown tired of the pretender's long visit, he
felt that "now or never" was the time for his descent on England.
The White Rose having torn himself away by the force of sheer pluck,
attempted to transplant himself to the coast of Deal, but he found
a Kentish knight ready to repel the Rose, and by a cry of "Go it, my
tulips!" encouraging his followers to resist all oppression.
The White Bose and his companions mournfully took their leaves, and as
many as could escape returned with press of sail to Flanders. Henry sent
a vote of thanks to the men of Kent, with a promise of gold, but the
remittance never came to hand from that day to the present.
Mr. P. Warbeck was now becoming such a nuisance in Flanders, that he was
told he must really suit himself with another situation immediately. He
tried Ireland, but the dry announcement of "no such person known" was
almost the only answer to his overtures. As a last resource, and a proof
of the desperate nature of his fortune, he actually threw himself upon
the generosity of the Scotch, which was almost as hopeless as running
his head against a stone wall; but as it was just possible that Perkin
Warbeck might be turned to profitable account against England, the
Scotch opened their hearts--where there is never any admission except
on business--to the adventurous wanderer. James the Third, king of
Scotland, chiefly out of spite to Henry, not only received Perkin as
the genuine Duke of York, but married him to Lady Catherine Gordon, the
lovely and accomplished daughter of the Earl of Huntley, a relative of
the royal house of Stuart. An agreement was drawn up between James of
Scotland, of the one part, and Perkin Warbeck, of the other, by virtue
of which Perkin was to be pitchforked on to the English throne, and
was to make over the town of Berwick-on-Tweed--when he got it--as an
acknowledgment to King James for his valuable services. After some
little delay, the Scotch crossed the border to enforce Perkin's demand;
but when that individual arrived in England, he found himself so
thoroughly snubbed that he sneaked back again.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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