The Coming of BillWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Coming of Bill
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
He had placed Ruth at once, directly he had heard her name. He
remembered having seen her photograph in the society section of the
Sunday paper which he borrowed each week. This was the daughter of old
John Bannister. There was no doubt about that. How she had found her
way to Kirk’s studio he could not understand; but there she certainly
was, and Percy was willing to bet the twenty dollars which, despite the
excitement of the moment, he had not forgotten to extract from Kirk in
a hurried conversation at the door, that her presence there was not
known and approved by her father.
The only reasonable explanation that Kirk was painting her portrait he
dismissed. There had been no signs of any portrait, and Kirk’s
embarrassment had been so obvious that, if there had been any such
explanation, he would certainly have given it. No, Ruth had been there
for other reasons than those of art.
“Unchaperoned, too, by Jove!” thought Percy virtuously, ignorant of
Mrs. Lora Delane Porter, who at the time of his call, had been busily
occupied in a back room instilling into George Pennicut the gospel of
the fit body. For George, now restored to health, had ceased to be a
mere student of “Elementary Rules for the Preservation of the Body” and
had become an active, though unwilling, practiser of its precepts.
Every morning Mrs. Porter called and, having shepherded him into the
back room, put him relentlessly through his exercises. George’s groans,
as he moved his stout limbs along the dotted lines indicated in the
book’s illustrated plates, might have stirred a faint heart to pity.
But Lora Delane Porter was made of sterner stuff. If George so much as
bent his knees while touching his toes he heard of it instantly, in no
uncertain voice.
Thus, in her decisive way, did Mrs. Porter spread light and sweetness
with both hands, achieving the bodily salvation of George while, at the
same time, furthering the loves of Ruth and Kirk by leaving them alone
together to make each other’s better acquaintance in the romantic
dimness of the studio.
Percy proceeded down-town, pondering. His first impulse, I regret to
say, was to send Ruth’s father an anonymous letter. This plan he
abandoned from motives of fear rather than of self-respect. Anonymous
letters are too frequently traced to their writers, and the prospect of
facing Kirk in such an event did not appeal to him.
As he could think of no other way of effecting his object, he had begun
to taste the bitterness of futile effort, when fortune, always his
friend, put him in a position to do what he wanted in the easiest
possible way with the minimum of unpleasantness.
Bailey Bannister, that strong, keen Napoleon of finance, was not above
a little relaxation of an evening when his father happened to be out of
town. That giant mind, weary with the strain of business, needed
refreshment.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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