BUTTER, CATERLINY, PATENT NOSTRUM!"  Squire Smith's house was lited up regardlis of expense.  His little sun William Henry stood upon the roof firin orf crackers.  The old 'Squire hisself was dressed up in soljer clothes and stood on his door-step, pintin his sword sollumly to a American flag which was suspendid on top of a pole in frunt of his house.  Frequiently he wood take orf his cocked hat & wave it round in a impressive stile.  His oldest darter Mis Isabeller Smith, who has just cum home from the Perkinsville Female Instertoot, appeared at the frunt winder in the West room as the goddis of liberty, & sung "I see them on their windin way."  Booteus I, sed I to myself, "you air a angil & nothin shorter.  N. Boneparte Smith, the 'Squire's oldest sun, drest hisself up as Venus the God of Wars and red the Decleration of Inderpendunse from the left chambir winder.  The 'Squire's wife didn't jine in the festiverties.  She sed it was the tarnulest nonsense she ever seed.  Sez she to the 'Squire, "Cum into the house and go to bed you old fool, you.  Tomorrer you'll be goin round half-ded with the rumertism & won't gin us a minit's peace till you get well."  Sez the 'Squire, "Betsy, you little appresiate the importance of the event which I this night commererate."  Sez she, "Commemerate a cat's tail--cum into the house this instant, you pesky old critter."  "Betsy," sez the 'Squire, wavin his sword, "retire."  This made her just as mad as she could stick.  She retired, but cum out agin putty quick with a panfull of Bilin hot water which she throwed all over the Squire, & Surs, you wood have split your sides larfin to see the old man jump up and holler & run into the house.  Except this unpropishus circumstance all went as merry as a carriage bell, as Lord Byrun sez.  Doctor Hutchinsis offiss was likewise lited up and a Transpirancy, on which was painted the Queen in the act of drinkin sum of "Hutchinsis invigorater," was stuck into one of the winders.  The aldinsville Bugle of Liberty noospaper offiss was also illumernated, & the follerin mottoes stuck out--"The Press is the Arkermejian leaver which moves the world."  "Vote Early."  "Buckle on your Armer."  "Now is the time to Subscribe."  "Franklin, Morse & Field."  "Terms 1.50 dollars a year--liberal reducshuns to clubs."  In short the villige of Baldinsville was in a perfect fewroar.  I never seed so many peple thar befour in my born days.  Ile not attemp to describe the seens of that grate night.  Wurds wood fale me ef I shood try to do it.  I shall stop here a few periods and enjoy my "Oatem cum dig the tates," as our skool master observes, in the buzzum of my famerly, & shall then resume the show biznis, which Ive bin into twenty-two (22) yeres and six (6) months." ____________________ AMONG THE SPIRITS.