The Complete Works of Artemus Ward — Part 1: Essays, Sketches, and LettersWard, Artemus
General
The Complete Works of Artemus Ward — Part 1: Essays, Sketches, and Letters
Ward, Artemus
American wit and humor
Mr. Davenport (One of the afterwards notorious Davenport Brothers.),
who has been for some time closely identified with the modern
spiritual movement, is in the city with his daughter, who is quite
celebrated as a medium. They are accompanied by Mr. Eighme and his
daughter, and are holding circles in Hoffman's Block every afternoon
and evening. We were present at the circle last evening. Miss
Davenport seated herself at a table on which was a tin trumpet, a
tambourine, and a guitar. The audience were seated around the room.
The lights were blown out, and the spirit of an eccentric
individual, well known to the Davenports, and whom they call George,
addressed the audience through the trumpet. He called several of
those present by name in a boisterous voice, and dealt several
stunning knocks on the table. George has been in the spirit-world
some two hundred years. He is a rather rough spirit, and probably
run with the machine and "killed for Kyser" when in the flesh.
(Kyser is an extensive New York butcher, and "to kill" [or
slaughter] for him has passed into a saying with the roughs, or
"bhoys," of New York. To "run with a [fire] machine.") He ordered
the seats in the room to be wheeled round so the audience would face
the table. He said the people on the front seat must be tied with a
rope. The order was misunderstood, the rope being merely drawn
before those on the front seat. He reprimanded Mr. Davenport for
not understanding the instructions. What he meant was that the rope
should be passed around each person on the front seat and then
tightly drawn, a man at each end of the seat to hold on to it. This
was done, and George expressed himself satisfied. There was no one
near the table save the medium. All the rest were behind the rope,
and those on the front seat were particularly charged not to let any
one pass by them. George said he felt first-rate, and commenced
kissing the ladies present. The smack could be distinctly heard,
and some of the ladies said the sensation was very natural. For the
first time in our eventful life we sighed to be a spirit. We envied
George. We did not understand whether the kissing was done through
a trumpet. After kissing considerably, and indulging in some
playful remarks with a man whose Christian name was Napoleon
Bonaparte, and whom George called "Boney," he tied the hands and
feet of the medium. He played the guitar and jingled the
tambourine, and then dashed them violently on the floor. The
candles were lit, and Miss Davenport was securely tied. She could
not move her hands. Her feet were bound, and the rope (which was a
long one) was fastened to the chair. No person in the room had been
near her or had anything to do with tying her. Every person who was
in the room will take his or her oath of that. She could hardly
have tied herself. We never saw such intricate and thorough tying
in our life. The believers present were convinced that George did
it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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