Delia was setting bread that night in the kitchen, and Maggie was
reading a ghost story from the evening paper. There was a fine sifting
of flour over the table, and it gave me my idea. When I went up to bed
that night, I left a powdering of flour here and there on the lower
floor, at the door into the library, a patch by the table, and--going
back rather uneasily--one near the telephone.
I was up and downstairs before Maggie the next morning. The patches
showed trampling. In the doorway they were almost obliterated, as by
the trailing of a garment over them, but by the fireplace there were two
prints quite distinct. I knew when I saw them that I had expected the
marks of Miss Emily's tiny foot, although I had not admitted it before.
But these were not Miss Emily's. They were large, flat, substantial, and
one showed a curious marking around the edge that--It was my own! The
marking was the knitted side of my bedroom slipper. I had, so far as
I could tell, gone downstairs, in the night, investigated the candles,
possibly in darkness, and gone back to bed again.
The effect of the discovery on me was--well undermining. In all the
uneasiness of the past few weeks I had at least had full confidence in
myself. And now that was gone. I began to wonder how much of the things
that had troubled me were real, and how many I had made for myself.
To tell the truth, by that time the tension was almost unbearable. My
nerves were going, and there was no reason for it. I kept telling myself
that. In the mirror I looked white and anxious, and I had a sense
of approaching trouble. I caught Maggie watching me, too, and on the
seventh I find in my journal the words: "Insanity is often only a
formless terror."
On the Sunday morning following that I found three burnt matches in
the library fireplace, and one of the candles in the brass holders was
almost gone. I sat most of the day in that room, wondering what would
happen to me if I lost my mind. I knew that Maggie was watching me, and
I made one of those absurd hypotheses to myself that we all do at times.
If any of the family came, I would know that she had sent for them, and
that I was really deranged! It had been a long day, with a steady summer
rain that had not cooled the earth, but only set it steaming. The air
was like hot vapor, and my hair clung to my moist forehead. At about
four o'clock Maggie started chasing a fly with a folded newspaper. She
followed it about the lower floor from room to room, making little harsh
noises in her throat when she missed it. The sound of the soft thud of
the paper on walls and furniture seemed suddenly more than I could bear.
"For heaven's sake!" I cried. "Stop that noise, Maggie." I felt as
though my eyes were starting from my head.
"It's a fly," she said doggedly, and aimed another blow at it. "If I
don't kill it, we'll have a million. There, it's on the mantel now. I
never--"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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