The Confessions of Jean Jacques Rousseau — CompleteRousseau, Jean-Jacques
Philosophy
The Confessions of Jean Jacques Rousseau — Complete
Rousseau, Jean-Jacques
Authors, French -- 18th century -- Biography; Rousseau, Jean-Jacques, 1712-1778
This was the only time in my life that I spoke in public, and before
a sovereign; and the only time, perhaps, that I spoke boldly and well.
What difference in the disposition of the same person. Three years ago,
having been to see my old friend, M. Roguin, at Yverdon, I received a
deputation to thank me for some books I had presented to the library of
that city; the Swiss are great speakers; these gentlemen, accordingly,
made me a long harangue, which I thought myself obliged in honor to
answer, but so embarrassed myself in the attempt, that my head became
confused, I stopped short, and was laughed at. Though naturally timid,
I have sometimes acted with confidence in my youth, but never in my
advanced age: the more I have seen of the world the less I have been
able to adapt its manners.
On leaving Berne, we went to Soleurre: the Archimandrite designing
to re-enter Germany, and return through Hungary or Poland to his own
country. This would have been a prodigious tour; but as the contents of
his purse rather increased than diminished during his journey, he was in
no haste to return. For me, who was almost as much pleased on horseback
as on foot, I would have desired no better than to have travelled thus
during my whole life; but it was pre-ordained that my journey should
soon end.
The first thing we did after our arrival at Soleurre, was to pay our
respects to the French ambassador there. Unfortunately for my bishop,
this chanced to be the Marquis de Bonac, who had been ambassador at the
Porte, and was acquainted with every particular relative to the Holy
Sepulchre. The Archimandrite had an audience that lasted about a quarter
of an hour, to which I was not admitted, as the ambassador spoke French
and Italian at least as well as myself. On my Grecian’s retiring, I was
prepared to follow him, but was detained: it was now my turn. Having
called myself a Parisian, as such, I was under the jurisdiction of his
excellency: he therefore asked me who I was? exhorting me to tell the
truth; this I promised to do, but entreated a private audience, which
was immediately granted. The ambassador took me to his closet, and shut
the door; there, throwing myself at his feet, I kept my word, nor
should I have said less, had I promised nothing, for a continual wish
to unbosom myself, puts my heart perpetually upon my lips. After having
disclosed myself without reserve to the musician Lutold, there was no
occasion to attempt acting the mysterious with the Marquis de Bonac, who
was so well pleased with my little history, and the ingenuousness
with which I had related it, that he led me to the ambassadress, and
presented me, with an abridgment of my recital. Madam de Bonac received
me kindly, saying, I must not be suffered to follow that Greek monk.
It was accordingly resolved that I should remain at their hotel till
something better could be done for me. I wished to bid adieu to my
poor Archimandrite, for whom I had conceived an attachment, but was not
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