Male friendship -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
The important thing for Lois, since she was a woman, lay in the need of
being sensible. Lois knew what this meant. She knew as well the
proportional insignificance of her own girlish impulses. Lois loved to
play, loved to be loyal to a friend, would have loved to love a man. But
these were part of her childhood, and childhood was a special state. Its
needs were indulgences one must outgrow. Childhood was of the same dim
category as art and stories. It wasn’t true. It was “make-believe.” It
lied. Muriel had already cast it aside like her short dresses. Lois was
aware she was carrying it a bit too far and too long. She was sixteen
and in ankle skirts and her braids were already gathered on her head.
She deemed herself brave and a trifle foolish to be so frolicsome at
sixteen. She was unswervingly confident of knowing how to change at the
needed moment. Meanwhile, she felt herself slightly inferior in the
things that held her and in the moods she loved. The rule of life was to
harden the present into a mold for the future. Yet Lois could not resist
pouring herself still into immediate and short-lived moments: giving
herself to emotions that must have no future. The gay spirit still
danced fast. Inexorably, from without, the things she learned bore
inward, seeped downward, stifled the things she had merely always felt.
Her acquired consciousness was a slow acid mist that would eat away the
stir and laughter of her birth. The gay spirit danced fast, though it
was dancing to death.
All this was Lois. All this was drawing, with her and in her, near to
David. With David the stalwart muteness of the years that inclosed him
with his mother: the sting and the song of his father: the drowsy stir
of the Town not yet awakened, not yet awakened to its death in the crash
of the industrial Age.
Two little teeming worlds, spying each other, craving each other across
the Nothing....
* * * * *
David and Thomas Rennard had agreed on an evening by letter. They were
going to dine together, and then to theater. Tom waited in the lights of
a Broadway chop-house.
He would not know the man he met: this he knew. He stood quite still and
gauged the crowds. The heavy strokes of their passing fell against his
measured life. They separated him as he stood there from the thoughts
and fruits of his growing. Tom stood graceful and free as few men do.
His weight was equal on both feet: his arms were unpropped: his back
curved subtly in rhythm with his head. Only in the faint peer of his
eyes was there defect. Tom was nearsighted. He did not admit this. He
wore no glasses, despite the advice of doctors. His best friends had no
inkling that when he recognized them, distant, on the street, it was not
by sight of their features but by knowledge of the accents of their
walk.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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