Diary fiction; England -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Men -- England -- Fiction; Middle class -- Fiction; Suburban life -- Fiction
Tradesmen and the scraper still troublesome. Gowing rather tiresome with
his complaints of the paint. I make one of the best jokes of my life.
Delights of Gardening. Mr. Stillbrook, Gowing, Cummings, and I have a
little misunderstanding. Sarah makes me look a fool before Cummings.
APRIL 9.—Commenced the morning badly. The butcher, whom we decided _not_
to arrange with, called and blackguarded me in the most uncalled-for
manner. He began by abusing me, and saying he did not want my custom. I
simply said: “Then what are you making all this fuss about it for?” And
he shouted out at the top of his voice, so that all the neighbours could
hear: “Pah! go along. Ugh! I could buy up ‘things’ like you by the
dozen!”
I shut the door, and was giving Carrie to understand that this
disgraceful scene was entirely her fault, when there was a violent
kicking at the door, enough to break the panels. It was the blackguard
butcher again, who said he had cut his foot over the scraper, and would
immediately bring an action against me. Called at Farmerson’s, the
ironmonger, on my way to town, and gave him the job of moving the scraper
and repairing the bells, thinking it scarcely worth while to trouble the
landlord with such a trifling matter.
Arrived home tired and worried. Mr. Putley, a painter and decorator, who
had sent in a card, said he could not match the colour on the stairs, as
it contained Indian carmine. He said he spent half-a-day calling at
warehouses to see if he could get it. He suggested he should entirely
repaint the stairs. It would cost very little more; if he tried to match
it, he could only make a bad job of it. It would be more satisfactory to
him and to us to have the work done properly. I consented, but felt I
had been talked over. Planted some mustard-and-cress and radishes, and
went to bed at nine.
APRIL 10.—Farmerson came round to attend to the scraper himself. He
seems a very civil fellow. He says he does not usually conduct such
small jobs personally, but for me he would do so. I thanked him, and
went to town. It is disgraceful how late some of the young clerks are at
arriving. I told three of them that if Mr. Perkupp, the principal, heard
of it, they might be discharged.
Pitt, a monkey of seventeen, who has only been with us six weeks, told me
“to keep my hair on!” I informed him I had had the honour of being in
the firm twenty years, to which he insolently replied that I “looked it.”
I gave him an indignant look, and said: “I demand from you some respect,
sir.” He replied: “All right, go on demanding.” I would not argue with
him any further. You cannot argue with people like that. In the evening
Gowing called, and repeated his complaint about the smell of paint.
Gowing is sometimes very tedious with his remarks, and not always
cautious; and Carrie once very properly reminded him that she was
present.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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