Now of all the inventions of the Tailor (who is of all artists the
most inventive) I hold the pocket to be the most commodious, and
saving the fig leaf, the most indispensible. Birds have their craw;
ruminating beasts their first or ante-stomach; the monkey has his
cheek, the opossum her pouch; and, so necessary is some convenience of
this kind for the human animal, that the savage who cares not for
clothing makes for himself a pocket if he can. The Hindoo carries his
snuff-box in his turban. Some of the inhabitants of Congo make a
secret fob in their wooly toupet, of which as P. Labat says, the worst
use they make is—to carry poison in it. The Matolas, a long haired
race who border upon the Caffres, form their locks into a sort of
hollow cylinder in which they bear about their little implements;
certes a more sensible bag than such as is worn at court. The New
Zealander is less ingenious; he makes a large opening in his ear, and
carries his knife in it. The Ogres, who are worse than savages, and
whose ignorance and brutality is in proportion to their bulk, are
said, upon the authority of tradition, when they have picked up a
stray traveller or two more than they require for their supper, to
lodge them in a hollow tooth as a place of security till breakfast;
whence it may be inferred that they are not liable to tooth ache, and
that they make no use of tooth-picks. Ogres, Savages, Beasts and Birds
all require something to serve the purpose of a pocket. Thus much for
the necessity of the thing. Touching its antiquity much might be said;
for it would not be difficult to show, with that little assistance
from the auxiliaries _must_ and _have_ and _been_ which enabled
Whitaker of Manchester to write whole quartos of hypothetical history
in the potential mood, that pockets are coeval with clothing: and, as
erudite men have maintained that language and even letters are of
divine origin, there might with like reason be a conclusion drawn from
the twenty-first verse of the third chapter of the book of Genesis,
which it would not be easy to impugn. Moreover Nature herself shows us
the utility, the importance, nay the indispensability, or, to take a
hint from the pure language of our diplomatists, the
_sinequanonniness_ of pockets. There is but one organ which is common
to all animals whatsoever: some are without eyes, many without noses;
some have no heads, others no tails; some neither one nor the other;
some there are who have no brains, others very pappy ones; some no
hearts, others very bad ones; but all have a stomach,—and what is the
stomach but a live inside pocket? Hath not Van Helmont said of it,
“_saccus vel pera est, ut ciborum olla?_”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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