"How well I remember it! I remember the word 'perhaps' particularly
struck me. I could sit for a long time with eyes shut, rocking my body
to and fro, whilst I was repeatedly saying over and over again,
'Perhaps, perhaps.' And suddenly I quite forgot what the word itself
meant. I tried to remember, but it was no use. I saw only a little
round, reddish blotch with two tiny tails. Are you attending?" Romashov
looked tenderly at her.
"How wonderful that we should think the same thoughts!" he exclaimed in
a dreamy tone. "But let us return to our _unser_. Does not this word
suggest the idea of something long, thin, lanky, and having a sting--a
long, twisting insect, poisonous and repulsive?"
"_Unser_, did you say?" Shurochka lifted up her head, blinked her eyes,
and stared obstinately at the darkest corner of the room. She was
evidently striving to improve on Romashov's fanciful ideas.
"No, wait. _Unser_ is something green and sharp. Well, we'll suppose it
is an insect--a grasshopper, for instance--but big, disgusting, and
poisonous. But how stupid we are, Romochka!"
"There's another thing I do sometimes, only it was much easier when I
was a child," resumed Romashov in a mysterious tone. "I used to take a
word and pronounce it slowly, extremely slowly. Every letter was drawn
out and emphasized interminably. All of a sudden I was seized by a
strangely inexpressible feeling: all--everything near me sank into an
abyss, and I alone remained, marvelling that I lived, thought, and
spoke."
"I, too, have had a similar sensation," interrupted Shurochka gaily,
"yet not exactly the same. Sometimes I made violent efforts to hold my
breath all the time I was thinking. 'I am not breathing, and I won't
breathe again till, till'--then all at once I felt as if time was
running past me. No, time no longer existed; it was as if--oh, I can't
explain!"
Romashov gazed into her enthusiastic eyes, and repeated in a low tone,
thrilling with happiness--
"No, you can't explain it. It is strange--inexplicable."
Nikoläiev got up from the table where he had been working. His back
ached, and his legs had gone dead from long sitting in the same
uncomfortable position. The arteries of his strong, muscular body
throbbed when, with arms raised high, he stretched himself to his full
length.
"Look here, my learned psychologists, or whatever I should call you, it
is supper-time."
A cold collation had been laid in the comfortable little dining-room,
where, suspended from the ceiling, a china lamp with frosted glass shed
its clear light. Nikoläiev never touched spirits, but a little decanter
of schnapps had been put on the table for Romashov. Shurochka,
contorting her pretty face by a contemptuous grimace, said, in the
careless tone she so often adopted--
"Of course, you can't do without that poison?"
Romashov smiled guiltily, and in his confusion the schnapps went the
wrong way, and set him coughing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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