Children -- Fiction; Fantasy fiction; Paranormal fiction
He kept his eyes fixed on the horizon, and never once turned his head
towards the man he was speaking to; only his lips moved; he did not even
lift a finger to brush off the great tears that fell one by one from his
cheeks to the deck. He seemed unconscious of them; as though it was so
long since those hard eyes had melted that they had forgotten how to do
it properly and the skin no longer registered the sensation of the
trickling. The tears continued to fall at intervals; Paul Rivers
actually heard them splash.
‘I went out steerage,’ the man continued to himself, or to the sea, or
to any one else who cared to listen, ‘and I come back steerage. That’s
my trouble. And now’—his eye shifted for a fraction of a second and
watched a huge wave go thundering by—‘I’m grave-huntin’, I guess. And
that’s about the size of it. Jest see it and—git back again!’
The first-class passenger made some kind and appropriate reply—words
with genuine sympathy in them—and then, getting no further answer, found
it difficult to continue the conversation. The man, he realised, had
only wanted a peg to hang his emotion on. It had to be a living peg, but
any other living peg would do equally well, and before long he would
find some one in the steerage who would listen with delight to the flood
that was bound to come. And, presently, he took his departure to his own
quarters where the sailors, with bare feet, were still swabbing the
slippery decks.
A couple of hours later, after breakfast, he leaned over the rail and
again saw the man on the steerage deck, and heard him talking volubly.
The tears were gone, but the smudges were still visible on the cheeks,
where they had traced a zigzag pattern. He was telling the history of
his fifty years’ disappointments and failures to one and all who cared
to listen.
And, apparently, many cared to listen. The man’s emotion was real; it
found vigorous expression. The sight of the old, loved shore, not seen
for half-a-century, but the subject of ten thousand yearnings, had been
too much for him. He told in detail the substance of these ten thousand
dreams—ever one and the same dream, of course—and in the telling of it
he found the relief his soul sought. He got it all out; it did him a
world of good, saving his inner being from a whole army of severe mental
fevers and spiritual pains. The man revelled in a delirium of
self-expression, and in so doing found sanity and health for his
overburdened soul.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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