But the offended Irene would not listen to his apologies. Immediately
after Gzhatski’s departure (a somewhat hasty departure on this occasion),
she went off to the convent. She hurried along, with the feeling one
has when one rushes to friends who have just suffered some trouble or
misfortune. Although Irene had never seen the face of a single one of
the sisters, nor had spoken to any of them, she had gradually, through
these daily hours of common prayer, come to regard them as her personal
friends. She was therefore anxious, on this occasion, to prove by her
presence her resentment of the insult offered to them by idle, vulgar
gossips.
Evensong was almost at an end when Irene entered the church. There were
very few people, the choir was singing an exultant hymn, the nuns were
frozen into a sort of beatific ecstasy. Irene gazed at them long and
seriously, and suddenly realized that no insult could possibly reach
them, that it was beyond the power of anyone to offend them. They were
above all earthly troubles; nothing earthly had any value for them,
all their hopes and dreams were concentrated in the next world. Thus,
an emigrant, during his first days on board ship, thinks restlessly of
the home he has left behind him, but when weeks have slipped away, his
interest in the past grows fainter, and he thinks and dreams only of what
he will find in the new land.
Père Etienne noticed Irene’s restlessness, but although he was well aware
of her friendship with Gzhatski, never mentioned the Russian’s name.
The clever, self-controlled priest neither opposed nor contradicted
Gzhatski’s views on Roman Catholicism, views which made themselves
clearly felt in all Irene’s words and arguments. He only more eloquently
than ever advocated the convent. Under his influence, Irene saw before
her a happy, peaceful old age, illuminated by constant sunshine, in the
lap of luxurious Southern nature. And then came Gzhatski to destroy
this dream; for, listening to his words, as eloquent as any of Père
Etienne’s, she grew vaguely ashamed of having abandoned her home and her
country, that dear Russia, of which Gzhatski spoke with such love and
enthusiasm. He tried hard, indeed, to point out to Irene all the charm
and goodness of the Russian people, and bitterly reproached her for
having so light-mindedly hardened her heart and turned away from them.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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