British -- Italy -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; Female friendship -- Fiction; Italy -- Fiction; Love stories
They got up simultaneously—Mrs. Arbuthnot had a sensation of surprise
that Mrs. Wilkins should be so tall—and went to a writing-table, and
Mrs. Arbuthnot wrote to Z, Box 1000, _The Times_, for particulars. She
asked for all particulars, but the only one they really wanted was the
one about the rent. They both felt that it was Mrs. Arbuthnot who ought
to write the letter and do the business part. Not only was she used to
organising and being practical, but she also was older, and certainly
calmer; and she herself had no doubt too that she was wiser. Neither
had Mrs. Wilkins any doubt of this; the very way Mrs. Arbuthnot parted
her hair suggested a great calm that could only proceed from wisdom.
But if she was wiser, older and calmer, Mrs. Arbuthnot’s new friend
nevertheless seemed to her to be the one who impelled. Incoherent, she
yet impelled. She appeared to have, apart from her need of help, an
upsetting kind of character. She had a curious infectiousness. She led
one on. And the way her unsteady mind leaped at conclusions—wrong ones,
of course; witness the one that she, Mrs. Arbuthnot, was miserable—the
way she leaped at conclusions was disconcerting.
Whatever she was, however, and whatever her unsteadiness, Mrs.
Arbuthnot found herself sharing her excitement and her longing; and
when the letter had been posted in the letter-box in the hall and
actually was beyond getting back again, both she and Mrs. Wilkins felt
the same sense of guilt.
“It only shows,” said Mrs. Wilkins in a whisper, as they turned away
from the letter-box, “how immaculately good we’ve been all our lives.
The very first time we do anything our husbands don’t know about we
feel guilty.”
“I’m afraid I can’t say I’ve been immaculately good,” gently protested
Mrs. Arbuthnot, a little uncomfortable at this fresh example of
successful leaping at conclusions, for she had not said a word about
her feeling of guilt.
“Oh, but I’m sure you have—I _see_ you being good—and that’s why you’re
not happy.”
“She shouldn’t say things like that,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot. “I must
try and help her not to.”
Aloud she said gravely, “I don’t know why you insist that I’m not
happy. When you know me better I think you’ll find that I am. And I’m
sure you don’t mean really that goodness, if one could attain it, makes
one unhappy.”
“Yes, I do,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “Our sort of goodness does. We have
attained it, and we are unhappy. There are miserable sorts of goodness
and happy sorts—the sort we’ll have at the mediaeval castle, for
instance, is the happy sort.”
“That is, supposing we go there,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot restrainingly.
She felt that Mrs. Wilkins needed holding on to. “After all, we’ve only
written just to ask. Anybody may do that. I think it quite likely we
shall find the conditions impossible, and even if they were not,
probably by to-morrow we shall not want to go.”
“I _see_ us there,” was Mrs. Wilkins’s answer to that.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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