British -- Italy -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; Female friendship -- Fiction; Italy -- Fiction; Love stories
But Mrs. Wilkins, after tugging agitatedly at a handkerchief that
wouldn’t come out of her pocket, did succeed at last in merely
apparently blowing her nose with it, and then, blinking her eyes very
quickly once or twice, looked at Mrs. Arbuthnot with a quivering air of
half humble, half frightened apology, and smiled.
“Will you believe,” she whispered, trying to steady her mouth,
evidently dreadfully ashamed of herself, “that I’ve never spoken to any
one before in my life like this? I can’t think, I simply don’t know,
what has come over me.”
“It’s the advertisement,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, nodding gravely.
“Yes,” said Mrs. Wilkins, dabbing furtively at her eyes, “and us both
being so—”—she blew her nose again a little—“miserable.”
Chapter 2
Of course Mrs. Arbuthnot was not miserable—how could she be, she asked
herself, when God was taking care of her?—but she let that pass for the
moment unrepudiated, because of her conviction that here was another
fellow-creature in urgent need of her help; and not just boots and
blankets and better sanitary arrangements this time, but the more
delicate help of comprehension, of finding the exact right words.
The exact right words, she presently discovered, after trying various
ones about living for others, and prayer, and the peace to be found in
placing oneself unreservedly in God’s hands—to meet all these words
Mrs. Wilkins had other words, incoherent and yet, for the moment at
least, till one had had more time, difficult to answer—the exact right
words were a suggestion that it would do no harm to answer the
advertisement. Non-committal. Mere inquiry. And what disturbed Mrs.
Arbuthnot about this suggestion was that she did not make it solely to
comfort Mrs. Wilkins; she made it because of her own strange longing
for the mediaeval castle.
This was very disturbing. There she was, accustomed to direct, to lead,
to advise, to support—except Frederick; she long since had learned to
leave Frederick to God—being led herself, being influenced and thrown
off her feet, by just an advertisement, by just an incoherent stranger.
It was indeed disturbing. She failed to understand her sudden longing
for what was, after all, self-indulgence, when for years no such desire
had entered her heart.
“There’s no harm in simply _asking_,” she said in a low voice, as if
the vicar and the Savings Bank and all her waiting and dependent poor
were listening and condemning.
“It isn’t as if it _committed_ us to anything,” said Mrs. Wilkins, also
in a low voice, but her voice shook.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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