The Essays of Douglas JerroldJerrold, Douglas William
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The Essays of Douglas Jerrold
Jerrold, Douglas William
English essays -- 19th century
[Illustration:
“One ... who would have added weight and dignity to the ceremony”
]
There was sadness in Windsor streets as the funeral procession moved
slowly towards the church. Old men and women talked of the frolics of
Sir Hugh; and though they said he had been in his day something of the
merriest for a parson, yet more than one gossip declared it to be her
belief that “worse men had been made bishops.” A long train of friends
and old acquaintance followed the body. First, came worthy Master
Slender—chief mourner. He was a bachelor, a little past his prime of
life, with a sad and sober brow, and a belly inclining to portliness.
The severe censors of Windsor had called him woman-hater, for that in
his songs and in his speech he would bear too hardly on the frailties
and fickleness of the delicate sex; for which unjust severity older
people might perchance, and they would, have found some small apology.
For, in truth, Master Slender was a man of softest heart; and though he
studiously avoided the company of women, he was the friend of all the
children of Datchet and Windsor. He always carried apples in his pocket
for little John Fenton, youngest child of Anne Fenton, formerly Anne
Page; and was once found sitting in Windsor Park, with little John upon
his knees,—Master Slender crying like a chidden maid. Of this enough.
Let it now suffice to say that Master Slender—for the Host was too heavy
to walk—was chief mourner. Then followed Ford and his wife; next, Mr
Page and his son William,—poor Mrs Page being dead two years at
Christmas, from a cold caught with over dancing, and then obstinately
walking through the snow from her old gossip Ford’s. Next in the
procession were Master Fenton and his wife, and then followed their
eight children in couples; then Robin—now a prosperous vintner, once
page to Sir John,—with Francis Simple; and then a score of little ones,
to whom the poor dead parson would give teaching in reading and
writing,—and, where he marked an apter wit among his free disciples,
something of the Latin accidence. These were all that followed Sir Hugh
Evans to his rest—for death had thinned the thick file of his old
acquaintance. One was wanting, who would have added weight and dignity
to the ceremony—who, had he not some few years before been called to
fill the widest grave that was ever dug for flesh, would have cast from
his broad and valiant face a lustrous sorrow on the manes of the dead
churchman,—who would have wept tears, rich as wine, upon the coffin of
his old friend; for to him, in the convenient greatness of his heart,
all men, from the prince of the blood to the nimming knave who stole the
“handle of Mrs Bridget’s fan,” were, by turns, friends and good fellows;
who, at the supper at the “Garter” (for the Host gave a solemn feast in
celebration of the mournful event), would have moralised on death and
mortal accidents, and, between his tankards, talked fine philosophy—true
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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