The extraordinary confessions of Diana PleaseCapes, Bernard
General
The extraordinary confessions of Diana Please
Capes, Bernard
Femmes fatales -- Fiction; France -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Naples (Kingdom) -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
But first I must relate of the most surprising _contretemps_ that ever
I was to experience, and which had the strangest and most immediate
bearing on my destinies.
I had noticed frequently that the hind legs of the dragon would linger
unaccountably, when the absurd monster, on his way off the stage,
happened to pass me standing in the wings. This would lead to much
muffled recrimination from the forequarters, which, exhausted by their
antics, aimed only at getting to their beer; the consequence being
that one eventful night, what between the haulings and contortions,
the back seam of the creature split, and out there rolled before my
eyes--Gogo.
He picked himself up immediately, and stood regarding me silently,
with a most doleful visage. My dear, I cannot describe what emotions
swept my soul in a little storm of laughter--the astonishment, the
pity, the bewilderment! In the midst, too confounded to arrange my
thoughts, I turned away, affecting not to recognise him; seeing which,
he uttered one enormous sigh, and stumped off to face the battery of
the stage-manager’s indignation.
I must have put a world of feeling that night into my little song
about the poor butterfly, that was stripped of its wings by a cruel
boy, and so prevented from keeping its assignation with the rose,
insomuch that it moved a very beautiful lady, who was present in a
private box, to send for me that she might thank me in person.
We had all of us, of course, heard of, and some of us remembered,
perhaps, chucking under the chin, the ravishing Mrs. Hart, who, from
pulling mugs of beer to the pinks of Drury Lane, had risen to be
_chère amie_ to his excellency the British Ambassador at Naples, and,
quite recently, his lady. She had lately come to London, _à travers
tous les obstacles_, to be made an honest woman of, and it was she who
craved the introduction, to which you may be sure I responded with as
much alacrity as curiosity. I could have no doubt of her the moment I
entered the box, and made, with becoming naïveté, my little curtsey.
She was certainly very handsome, in spite of her twenty-seven years
and her large feet, though, I thought, lacking in grace. But her face
was beautifully formed, with a complexion of apple-blossoms, and red
lips a little swollen with kissing, and, to crown everything, a great
glory of chestnut hair. There were tears in her fine eyes as she
turned impulsively to address me--
“La, you little darling, you’ve made me cry with your butterflies and
things. Come here while I buss you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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