“You’ll feel better by midnight,” Mr. Fitch murmured, “You’ve worried
too much. This’ll be a hit. It’s been a hit in London and Paris. The
critics”--the adapter smiled--“won’t dare say anything worse than that
it’s immoral. And Cora Boyle will make them laugh in the third act, so
that’ll be safe.”
“Boyle? Who’s she? That black headed gal that plays the street walker,
y’mean? She’s no good. Had her last winter in Mountain Dew. Common as
dirt and no more sense than a turnip.”
Mr. Fitch answered in his affable whisper, “Of course she’s common as
dirt. That’s why I asked you to get her. Why waste time training some
one to be common when the town’s full of them?”
“But that ain’t actin’, Clyde!”
“It’s quite as good. And,” Mr. Fitch declared, “she’s what the women
like.”
“You always talk as if women made a show pay!”
“That happens to be just what they do, Mr. Carlson. That’s why Richard
the Third doesn’t make as much money as Camille or East Lynne. Women
come to a play to see other women wear clothes they wouldn’t be seen
in and do things they wouldn’t dream of doing. Please try to eat
something.”
“You’re all wrong,” Carlson said, chewing a pepsin tablet.
Mr. Fitch shrugged, arranged his moustaches and mentioned a dozen
actresses whose success was built on the art of enchanting their own
sex. Carlson had a respect for this playwright’s opinion and while
the two early acts of “Nicoline” played he saw from his box that
Cora Boyle’s swagger carried some message to the female part of the
audience. For her, women laughed loudly. They merely sniffled over the
well bred woes of the heroine. The heroine’s antics were insupportable.
The second curtain fell and Carlson descended to the dressing room of
this unsatisfactory gentlewoman, gave a rasping lecture that scared her
maid away. He had to help hook her gown and yelled over the powder of
her advertised shoulders, “If you want that sassy Boyle gal to be the
hit of the show, go on! You act like you’d lost your last cent on the
races and had sand in your shoes. Now, you!” A feeling of heated blades
in his stomach stopped the speech. He heard the stage manager knock on
the dressing room door. The actress moved weeping past his anguish.
He leaned on the table and saw his sweating face in the tilted mirror.
The thin, remote music of the orchestra began behind the curtain. This
third act was set in the rowdy café of a small French city. If it went
well, the play was safe, would last out the winter, make him richer. He
should go up to his box and show himself unperturbed to rival managers
civilly tranquil in their free seats. But he leaned, looking at his
wet, bald head with a sick weariness. What was the use of this trade?
He wore down his years trying to teach silly women and sillier men to
act. He got nothing from living but stomach trouble and money. The
money would go to his sister in Stockholm when he died. He had never
liked his sister, hadn’t seen her in thirty years. He pitied himself so
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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